Back to Fan Fiction"Previously on The Nanny…" Niles and C.C.’s first encounter and the way they fall in love with each other 21 years before we meet them. The Blonde’s persistent attitude, however, propels the Butler to vow he wouldn’t have anything to do with her until she became a "human being;" an emotional tug-of-war that keeps them apart for years…
Part Two of a Series
by
Malu Reis
(myfanfic.mail@gmail.com)
Niles sat on the couch in Maxwell’s living room and stretched his legs. He was feeling exhausted that day, not exactly his body was tired but his soul was terribly weakened. Thirteen years had passed since he had met C.C. for the first time and his plans to "tame" her weren’t going too well. Time seemed to prove as implacable as ever. He was really upset about that but something else was leading him to hopelessness and desperation. The Sheffields had just experienced very sad moments with the recent loss of Maxwell’s beloved wife Sarah. The house that once was a joyful place to live in had become a dreadful mausoleum.
After Margaret, the first daughter, the happy couple had two more children: Brighton, eight, and Grace, four years old - at the time of their mother’s passing. They were then three lovely kids who would soon need all the attention they could get.
The Butler remained in the mansion; a loyal professional who faced the sudden disappearance of his young mistress and friend with great courage while conversely the family seemed to fall apart. Max went on to so many deep periods of mourning that for innumerous times the kids only had Niles’ shoulders to cry on.
Sarah’s death also changed Niles’ plans for the future. With the kids out of their diapers, Maxwell had agreed to hire someone else to take care of them so his friend could somehow pursue another career; an idea that Niles had before he left England with Max. But since the "world" seemed to have collapsed on top of that house the Butler’s priorities also had changed a great deal.
Elizabeth Sheffield, for instance - one of the kids’ grandmothers - barely stayed in New York to say good-bye to her daughter-in-law and went back to England. Sarah’s parents weren’t any help either. So Niles bravely accepted his fate supporting the family as well as he could but never admitting that the real reason why he stayed around was the same that kept, a then, more mature and skillful Broadway producer from trying a solo career: a mutual, undying love.
C.C. continued playing the shrew over the years and even though sometimes she got very upset with Maxwell, she couldn’t leave that house either. She couldn’t deny that the way Niles kept the family together dragged her even deeper in love with him. It wasn’t just passion anymore. It had turned into something more profound. It also involved respect and admiration. She wouldn’t give up on him.
Both had every reason to believe that their love had been predestined, that their first encounter was guided by fate. Their affection grew stronger. But there was a huge obstacle between them. A pledge Niles made a couple of days after he met her for the first time. He would never talk about love with her again until she changed, till she became a "human being." That pledge remained solid over the years as if it was written in stone.
In the meantime, C.C. was also devastated by the loss of her friend. She took care of nearly all the funeral arrangements under heavy sedatives. After the burial she wandered around visiting several places they shared together and felt even bluer. Deep down she was not only a "human being," but also a caring one at least when she wanted to.
One night she was so worn out when she got home that she simply flopped on her couch as her thoughts began to run through her mind like a movie for hours. With rare exceptions, which always involved Niles, her life had been very dull in the past years. She was tired of pretending to be an "emissary from hell." Just a week and a half earlier, her best - or better yet - her only real girlfriend had passed on. She still had a chance of happiness since the only man she ever loved was the same who confessed his attraction for her once. Unfortunately, she knew he wouldn’t take the first step. She had to make a move before he could give up on them. All she had to do was to be a little more humble, stop pretending to be what truly she was not, kick that kitchen’s door open, finally admit her love for him, and run right into the man’s arms. She didn’t care about her parents’ opinions anymore. It wouldn’t be easy, she knew that, but she couldn’t remain alone as a dog just because her destiny was to fall in love with a man who didn’t have the same number of digits in his bank account as her. Besides, he was so bright that even in her business field she found herself getting tips from him several times. He could do anything successfully, if he wanted to, and she also wanted to help him in the future.
But no matter how excited the Blonde was she couldn’t stop from felling hesitant. With very few intimate exceptions, he always acted as cold as steel. What if he laughed at her and threw her aside like an old shoe? Well, she would have to take her chances.
* * * * * * *
C.C. slowly opened her eyes that morning. Despite the sunny glow in her bedroom she had a very dark cloud hanging above her head. She turned to the other side of her bed trying to picture the man of her dreams there. She had done that a thousand times before but now she was decided to move a little beyond the imagination level. She was going to let him know how she felt about him. How she wanted and still needed him.
-"I can’t believe that the obstinate brick head is gonna win after all!" She said hugging her extra pillow afraid of the idea that he could still despise her. -"Oh, tell me I didn’t wait too long. I can’t go on without him." Feeling as silly as a high school girl she sighed loudly, hopped out of bed, and made a quick trip to the bathroom. -"I guess I’ll know in a couple of hours."
She took a long shower, put a very sexy dress and some light make-up on, splashed some drops of her favorite perfume and headed to Maxwell’s place. The Broadway producer was now living in a beautiful mansion bought just after his career was consolidated.
-‘Here I am.’ C.C. thought jumping out of the cab. -‘I know I haven’t been a good girl, but you must admit Mighty One, he hasn't been a good boy either.’
She climbed the steps to the house and was about to ring the bell when Adam, Maxwell’s chauffeur at the time, came out the door.
-"Hello, Adam. Is Mr. Sheffield home?" She asked even though she knew the answer.
-"Oh, good morning, Miss Babcock. No, he isn’t. Actually I’m leaving to pick him up at the Hotel Edison."
-"Oh yes." She concealed. -"Yes, he told me he would be meeting some British talent agent today. Well, I’ll wait for him anyway."
-"Yes, Madame." He held the door open for her.
She got into the mansion and heard some of the kids’ voices coming from the dining room. Expecting to have some minutes in private with the Butler she turned on her heels and almost went home when she felt she had to have that out of her system or she would never have the guts again. She walked outside through the hallway door so she could enter the kitchen through the backyard and avoid the children. While going around the house she rehearsed her words silently. -‘Niles, I know you told me you would never "touch me" again until I behaved like a mature woman. However, I’m tired of being so lonely and I’m afraid of losing you. I decided to stop pretending to be something I learned with you that I am not. I love you and I want you back.’ She got next to the backdoor and whispered: -"That’s it, short and direct." She was hesitant but for the first time in years unafraid of him. Before she entered she thought to sneak a look; he could be there with somebody and she wouldn’t know what to do.
Feeling a strange suspense and excitement she finally peered through the glass and… then… she gaped at the view. He was definitely not alone. He had his back to the door but she could see him tenderly holding a woman in his arms and then kissing her on the cheek. She didn’t need to watch more since she immediately recognized who she was. -‘It’s Susan!’ She screamed in her thoughts. Standing there out of sight she was completely devastated; her head in a turmoil. -‘I remember her. She is one of Maxwell's cousins. She danced with Niles at her brother’s wedding. I bet they had something going on at the time and…’
Her breathing was shallow when she got to the street and hailed a taxi. Her thoughts wouldn’t give her a rest and she couldn’t think straight. -‘Damn the man is scum! As far as I know, that woman is married now!’ She recalled in awe.
She was right about the last fact but again misunderstanding every gesture that came from the Butler. Niles and Susan were only good friends. She was happily married and living in Washington. She couldn’t come to Sarah’s funeral and now was paying Maxwell her respects. Since he wasn’t home, Niles took the job of telling her all the sad details about Mrs. Sheffield’s death. Susan ended up crying and now he was simply comforting her.
When C.C. got home she was sobbing. -"HOW COULD HE? THAT...THAT LADY KILLER!" She screamed completely out of her mind. Tossing her purse on the couch and pouring herself some scotch she resumed. -"You stupid romantic fool, he is a man! He is a MAN! What did you expect, that he would stay waiting for you chaste, and faithful forever?" She drank the whole thing in one gulp. -"Don’t you see that he already had something going on with her while he was kissing you in that freezer, you sucker!" Going deeper in her anger she concluded. -"Yeah, and as any other bellboy in this world he had to have an itching palm. GOLD DIGGER, that’s what he is!" She took a deep breath and ended. -"Okay, you son of a leech! You can suck the blood and steal the heart and money of whomever you want; not mine! You’re not the only pebble on the beach. If it’s all a matter of greed, I will pay in the same coin. If I can’t have the "pauper" I will invest in the "prince." She knew if he still had feelings for her it would be the end of him if he thought she had the hots for Maxwell Sheffield instead.
-"Damn Niles, you were my hero. Why did you have to become the villain?"
And from that day on - not fully grasping why - Niles’ "hobby" became keeping that spitfire out of his boss’ hair.
* * * * * * *
1993…
Two years had gone by since that episode in the kitchen happened. C.C. never mentioned it to anybody; including the Butler. She remained in love with him, but decided to move on with her life while immersed in the character that she had created for herself.
Niles was feeling hopeless. C.C. definitely seemed to have lost all her interest in him and conquering her heart had become a fruitless fight. On rare occasions he caught her checking him out, or giving him a veiled smile, or even being nice to him, but those happened in very few instances. To make matters worse, he had to admit that the Blonde had started showing feelings for her business partner and that made him very unhappy. Unfortunately he had so many things to manage around the house after Mrs. Sheffield died. He also became in charge of the kids for he was the only one that the little devils seemed to respect; none of the nannies that the agency sent were able to hold the job for more than a couple of days.
Maxwell Sheffield respected C.C. Babcock as a businesswoman, despite being very economic with words to praise her, but he didn’t think she would fit the perfect role model as a mother according to his book. The kids would sure need a different feminine figure in the near future.
One day, however, the life of the entire family changed with the arrival of one particular nanny. Perhaps the fact that she wasn’t exactly a professional nanny but a vivacious and spontaneous young woman with a natural touch to deal with kids helped a lot. She was trying to sell cosmetics from door to door for the first time when she rang the bell at the Sheffield’s residence.
-"Hello, I’m Fran Fine." She said in a nasal but joyful way.
-"Yes, come in. We’ve been expecting you." Niles answered with his solemn look.
-"You have?"
-"You are here for the nanny position?"
-"I could be." She then started blabbering something about one of her uncle’s condo in Boca Raton when she saw the size of the house.
Not paying any attention the Butler asked for her résumé so he could show it to Mr. Sheffield.
-"You know what, why don’t you go get this Mr. Sheffield. I’ll then do the resume presenting myself." She shamelessly supplied.
-"As you wish." He said finally realizing that she was there by accident and that he wouldn’t miss that encounter for any of his magic cleaners in the sink cabinet. -"This ought to be good." He added under his breath.
The door that gave to Mr. Sheffield’s library was opened but Niles came knocking not a bit happy by what he saw there. Miss Babcock was giving him a pretense Shiatsu session. It was "funny" how C.C. always chose to have some physical contact with Maxwell every time she heard the doorbell.
-‘If it isn’t a Pavlov’s reflex, what is it then?’ Niles thought sarcastically.
Could it be because she knew he would be around announcing someone and she wanted to drive him jealous? If that was the reason, she sure had that power. Niles knew his employer was not quite interested in her, but he couldn’t stop himself from being so envious.
-"Sorry to interrupt, sir..." Deadpan. -"I see you’re working hard as always, Miss Babcock."
-"Theater has always been a passion of mine." Provocative.
-"Mmm, I can’t wait to see what you’ll be mounting next." He darted looking at Maxwell but seeing the hateful glare that she shot at him.
-"Yes, Niles…What is it?" Maxwell asked trying to put an end to that petty quarrel. -‘Why do these two hate each other so much?’ He thought for the millionth time.
-"Sir, there is a new nanny waiting to be interviewed."
-"What happened to the old one?" C.C. asked apprehensively.
-"Brighton staged another fake suicide." Max answered hopelessly.
Niles complemented. -"Best one yet. Spread-eagle on the marble with a bit of catsup trickling from his ears."
-"We’ve got half of the money people in New York coming to our backers’ party and I will not have those children running loose!" C.C. said but immediately noticed how indelicate she sounded and tried to fix it. -"Not that I don’t love them as if they were my very own."
-"MmHmm…" Niles moaned.
-"I do." C.C. amended between her teeth.
Even though Miss Fine presented her résumé written in lipstick and listed her mother from Queens instead of being able to list the Queen Mother as reference, Niles was pulling for her. She was different from any other lady that came to that house looking for a nanny job. She seemed to be exactly what the kids needed. Later, when she got hired more out of necessity than because of her skills, and managed to change some of the house’s most boring habits, he became certain - she was not only what the kids needed but what his boss needed perhaps…
To make a long story short, Niles was so right about Miss Fine being the best medicine for his boss that five years later she would become "Mrs. Sheffield."
Max was a fabulous man: attractive, charming, honest, but above all he was too young to remain a lonely widower. Fran was a gorgeous woman, a little naive sometimes, but also very clever in her own way. Both had bitter times in their recent past and they would finally benefit from each other’s company.
* * * * * * *
Present time…
Niles was sitting in the kitchen and recalling when Fran first got to the house. The way she easily became one of his best friends. The way he more than once got into trouble to help her out of hers; like the day he pretended to be Maxwell so she could give some of her relatives from Boca a heartburn telling them that she was married to a millionaire. Beyond that, he also loved her everlasting list of tales: like her uncle Jack's dependence on Beano, or a guy that one day used his hernia girdle backwards and had to suffer a double-amputation (P.S. - she was not talking about his legs). But his favorite story was Richie Schneider’s, the son of an x-ray technician. According to Fran, the guy had two left feet and was a disaster every time he tried to dance the Hokey Pokey and people said "put your left foot in."
Niles guffawed shortly.
He then remembered Fran in her beautiful gown at her wedding, and how proud he felt for having helped the couple with their deserved union.
He also brought to mind that despite being a bit high at the wedding celebration, he had vowed to heat up his relationship with C.C. again. He recollected that C.C. pretended to be crushed by Maxwell’s new wedding - but conversely - she wasn’t as convincing as she was at some other times. He remembered that the Blonde actually helped them when she told Fran to stop feeling guilty about almost running away with Max’s baby brother and pushed her to take action against his selfish behavior. She consciously knew where those words would lead the duo. So why did she help them? And why did he have the feeling that every now and then she was flirting with him, as if trying to seduce him again?
Suddenly, sadness came down on him. After all, despite all of C.C.’s friendly actions, almost a year had passed since the wedding, and nothing had happened. Worse, things were getting out of control again. The Blonde had her setbacks towards Fran, Max - and to his total distress - for the past couple of weeks, she had been seeing a new man who had been treating her like junk and somehow she seemed to enjoy it.
Niles was feeling completely upset when a sentence he used against Miss Babcock once, started haunting him, ‘boys never want a toy until another boy wants to play with it.’ -"Could it be?" He thought out loud and then dropped his head on the table.
Minutes later, he was drowned in self-pity and barely noticed when Maxwell came down the stairs.
-"Niles?"
-"Mmm?" He moaned almost inaudibly.
-"Niles, what's wrong?"
-"Oh, I hate Miss Babcock’s boyfriend - Colin. But don’t worry, I’m a professional. I won’t let it interfere with my work."
-"Okay, then."
-"Don’t you wanna know why I hate Colon?"
-"Colin."
-"Looks more like a colon to me."
-"Oh my God, Niles, I think you are jealous!"
Niles moaned again.
-"You have feelings for Miss Babcock, don’t you? Well, why don’t you just come out and tell her?"
-"Well…I mean, isn’t it obvious? I mean, what do I have to do, hit the woman over the head…?" Pensively and under his breath. -"Actually, I’ve done that." Then recalling something he had forgotten he concluded. -"Oh, I’m useless and I have no reason to live. Just fire me."
Grieved with his friend’s pain Max tried to cheer him up. -"Oh, don't be ridiculous. Why would I fire you?"
-"Cause I just remembered that Lynn Redgrave arrived an hour ago and I forgot to tell you?"
Max tried to remain calm but couldn’t help it. -"You see, now you got a reason to live…"
-"Mmm?"
-"…Because you’re gonna start looking for a new job!"
As soon as Mr. Sheffield nervously left the room Niles dropped his head onto the table again. He knew his boss was not talking seriously. -"Twenty-one years…" He spoke to himself tired of fighting his feelings. -"…Almost twenty-one years wasted."
He had to find out the truth about her. While she was after Maxwell he didn’t care. He felt uneasy sometimes, but deep inside he knew Max had no interest in her. But now a bloody stranger was between them and he had to admit that he was jealous to his bones. He needed to know if she felt anything for Colon - or whatever his name was - but above all, if she still nurtured any feelings for him, Niles. He knew he was still crazy about her. But what about her emotions? Not knowing that was simply killing him.
He quickly cleaned up the mess around and went upstairs to take a hot shower and relax a little. Nevertheless, all he could do was think about...who else. -"Damn, can't you stop haunting me, witch?!" He cried out loud from under the water spray while trying to brush her image away.
His efforts, though, were of no avail.
He remembered the day they first met. The way she thought he was Maxwell's cousin who lived in Australia. The way they wildly kissed in that backyard. The way he almost lost her forever in that freezer. The silly pledge he made when he got fed up with her attitude. The dog he indirectly gave her suggesting that his boss should buy it for her as a birthday present so she wouldn’t be so lonely. A mischievous grin crossed his face when he recalled the day he nearly gave up the same silly promise if it hadn’t been for Max and Fran catching them kissing lingeringly in the middle of the living room. -".."Cluck like a chicken…It turns me on?" He wondered choking a wild laugh. -"What was I thinking?" He shook his head. -"They got back in the nick of time C.C...In the nick of time!" He sighed heavily with his eyes closed as the uncountable times they had danced together crossed his mind. -"Dear God in Heaven, how hard it gets to behave when you get that near! You’ve been driving me crazy with hunger and I don’t think I will resist another year!" He hoarsely whispered.
Niles got out of the shower very disturbed and started bringing down his closet after an appropriate suit. -"To hell with that pledge! I’m not getting any younger and she won’t wait forever. That is, if she is still waiting." He froze at the thought. -"That’s it! I don’t care if she is coming back from a date, from a brain transplant, or from her honeymoon with a triple-headed alien, she will hear from me when she gets here today."
An hour later he was back from a quick trip to a florist and rehearsed some silly words before the mirror in the foyer when a "hurricane" came storming through the front door; it was her. He started talking away while she was impatiently hanging her coat in the closet.
-"All right..it’s er..It’s time I got something out in the open. I..huh..I think it’s time you knew that-…"
-"Oh, would you spit it out?" She cut him off rudely. -"Colin just dumped me and I have an anonymous phone call to make to the IRS."
Niles abruptly changed his speech. -"So, you are not seeing him anymore?"
-"Mmm…No! Now what do you wanna get "out in the open"?"
Worried by her mood that the moment might not be the best he held off his confession and changed the game. -"You! All animals should run free!"
She had a strange feeling about that. His words were rude as always but his guard seemed down, something about the look in his eyes; she thought. -"That isn’t what you were gonna say." She risked. -"And why are you holding those flowers?"
He hated to be read like an open book and she sometimes did that surprisingly well. -"I thought you would like a snack." He concealed again.
-‘Is that so?’ She wondered disappointedly. She knew she wouldn’t be able to trade wits with him but her anti-rejection mechanism started full power. -"You're wearing your fancy pants! Niles has a crush on someone." She attacked like a little girl.
-"Oh, do not!" Her irony hit him like the sharpest barb.
She smiled victoriously and then resumed risking an extemporaneous musical adaptation. -"Niles and his girlfriend sitting on a tree: D-U-S-T-I-N-G!" She broke into laughter but realized that she was pushing her luck. -"All right, who is it?" She expected to have another chance with him, bringing the conversation back to a more civilized level.
Too late, his feelings were out of place. -"Her!" He pointed at Miss Redgrave who was coming out of Maxwell’s office. He quickly paced toward her and pleaded under his breath. -"Just go with me on this and pretend you are my girlfriend."
C.C. was astounded. She just remained there watching Niles hand the flowers to the actress and then leave pathetically, with his head on her shoulder like a pet. He was obviously playing games but she didn’t understand why. -‘What was that?’ Incredulous of what had just happened she slowly moved to the couch. -‘I could swear he was about to throw the towel in.’ She wondered.
Right she was. But he didn’t, once again due to her attitude.
In her mind she recalled how he’d been smoother lately. Particularly after she went to Boston with Maxwell and his daughter and then had that car-wreck out in the snow. She could see the fear in his eyes when she got back; the fear of losing her one more time.
-‘He can’t be interested in anybody else. Not my Niles. Not him…’ She insisted in her thoughts. -‘And why Lynn?’ She shook her head. -‘Nonsense.’ She stood up again. -"Okay, if you still want to play hard to get, you can count on me, Butler Boy! I’m gonna make things even harder for you." She let out unafraid of who could possibly listen as she walked pensively to the study.
Niles had quickly apologized for his farce with Miss Redgrave and ran upstairs. He was infuriated by acting so craven. -"She still wants me, I bet. Cold feet! Cold feet! Why did I chicken out?" He took off his jacket almost ripping it. -"You were pathetic! What’s your problem, for crying out loud?!" He complained to himself like a teenage-boy who failed to ask the cutest girl in class out. -"Do you know what your problem is?" He stared at himself in the mirror. -"Do you? PRIDE! She doesn’t even seem to care about your profession anymore. Why should you? Is it a matter of money? Why don’t you go back to England and fix it!" Niles sat on the edge of his bed dispiritedly. So he had the looks, education, and apparently some "unclaimed" money. What was missing? He didn’t know, but C.C. - deep inside - respected him more than anybody else in this world. He didn’t have to prove anything to her except his love.
Lost in his inner turmoil he suddenly remembered he had to start dinner. -"Yep, that’s life." He went to his bathroom, splashed some cool water in his face and ran downstairs again.
* * * * * * *
He was chopping some mushrooms half an hour later when the person he least expected to see came looking for a bottle of water. She had been trying to call him through the intercom for a while but his unit was off. He didn’t have to raise his eyes to know who it was; the tantalizing smell of her perfume announced her.
-"I’ve been calling you, fool!" She attacked.
-"You’ve been calling me worse names. So what, witch?"
-"I’m not a witch!" She cut in impatiently.
-"You are right, if you were I’m sure you would transform yourself into something more appealing."
-"Shut up!"
Not in the mood to quarrel he obeyed and kept working with his eyes low.
She looked at him for a second, still confused by his attitude minutes earlier. She didn’t realize that she was undressing him with her eyes. -‘How can such an obnoxious man be so hot.’ She smiled. -‘No, not hot: physically combustible.’ She caught herself mentally mocking his sometimes affected British way to speak and chortled, nearly choking on the last gulp of water.
He stopped abruptly. -"What is this Babcock? "Let’s Bug the Butler’s Day", huh?"
Weary of his quips she scoffed. -"No, I was just wondering. When you are driving on a highway and you see a sign "Clean Restrooms Ahead"…how many can you scrub and polish before you get tired?"
He arched his eyebrow. -"You are asking for trouble, aren’t you?" He briefly checked her outfit. -"I bet you wear those shoulder pads to protect your big skull as your head rocks from left to right, don’t you?" He mocked a dumb blond.
She narrowed her eyes. -"Nile-…"
-"…one of these days you might find a fistful of nails in them. You better watch out!"
C.C. scowled at him. -"Niles, do you wash your head in the kitchen sink?"
No answer.
-"You know, that’s the best place to wash vegetables."
-"Me, a vegetable?"
-"Exactly."
-"I assume that entitles me to call you "animal," then. Or perhaps thanks to your heart of stone, a "mineral"?"
-"Heart of stone? Me?"
-"No, Mother Teresa of Calcutta."
-"That from the man who poured my Martinis through dirty gym socks?"
-"Oopsy…"
-"Nasty!"
Brighton suddenly burst in and felt the atmosphere of animosity. -"Jesus guys, you never got along. Why are you gonna start fighting now?"
Both gave him a hateful glare.
-"Not funny, huh?"
-"NO!" Both in unison.
-"O-kay." He uncomfortably picked an apple from a bowl and slowly walked up the back stairs.
-"You are disgusting, Niles!"
Quickly washing and drying his hands. -"Miss Babcock, do me a favor, will you?"
-"What is it?"
-"GO TO HELL!" He raised his voice.
Brighton, who was still walking up the steps, added under his breath. -"Devil hates competition."
Niles smiled. -"Taught you well Grasshopper."
The boy turned around and bowed. -"Thanks, Master Po."
C.C. just picked up a pear from the same bowl and was about to toss it at the boy…
Seeing Brighton’s reaction Niles quickly turned to her. -"Miss Babcock, put that down P.D.Q. if you don’t want to clean it afterwards."
She remained staring at him with her hand in the air. Brighton had already disappeared but there was always him.
-"Babcock, did you understand or do you want me to draw it?" He insisted dryly.
-"You are very hard to swallow, you know that?" She put the pear back in its place.
He had a naughty return for that but decided to let her get away without hearing it.
-"So, tell me, hobgoblin. Are you gonna deny that you prepared my Martinis that way?"
-"Now that you mentioned, Tasmanian Devil. Yes, I’ll deny it. One day, I was preparing one of your drinks when Miss Grace came in with her gym-bag. I asked for a dirty sock. I told her that it was a ritual that usually brought…" He thought for a split second. -"…Some nonsense like good luck. The cute little thing fell for it and gave me the sock. I really poured a Martini through it to show her how it worked, but I never gave that to you, moron!"
-"I don’t believe you."
-"Tell me what’s new."
She nervously squeezed the bottle that she had drained empty within her hands.
He ignored and snapped. -"Hey, I just remembered that I wanted to ask you something…"
-"What?"
-"How is Second Avenue? Is that Leon still looking for you?"
-"Leon? Who the heck is Leon?"
Niles stared at her with a crooked smile.
Her eyes became two satellite dishes when she suddenly recalled. -"You?!"
He grinned.
-"It was you! You asked that hooker in that Police Station to say hello to me?"
-"No…!" He pouted as if offended.
-"How did you know then?"
-"Because I paid her."
Her mouth dropped. -"You-...!"
-"Halt!"
She swallowed the name. -"…Niles, that cost me three weeks so I could convince Maxwell that I had nothing to do with that slut!"
-"And almost my job when, out of guilt, I told him." He added in a lower tone.
-"He knew then, and he didn’t tell me?"
-"Perhaps he was afraid he would have to wipe my blood from this very floor afterwards."
Distrustful. -"Oh yeah? And why did you spontaneously tell me that now?"
-"Because he may be afraid of you, but I am not."
-"You should."
-"Perhaps…" Thoughtfully. -"But, you know, sometimes one’s life gets a little boring. I just felt like living dangerously tonight. After all, when we both met…it was MURDER." He sounded like the Harts’ friend’s raucous voice.
-"You would certainly play their butler's part pretty well."
-"And you would be great in the role of Freeway." He darted coming too near for her comfort.
-"Listen oyster brain, I-I-…" She nervously stuttered.
-"Oyster brain, huh? That was good!" He greeted sarcastically. -"Wasn’t it you who used to recheck the yes/no tests in school, by using heads for ‘yes’ and tails for ‘no’?"
-"And isn’t it you who wears a sweater and a ski jacket for any painting job in the house just because you read on those gallons, "for best results put on two coats?" C.C. guffawed.
With a piercing look he came over to her; she backed off again. -"You are draining out my patience today. Be careful, I’m sure you would die if you depended on dialing 911."
-"I don’t see why."
-"Well, nine for you, wouldn’t be a big deal. But what would you do about the number 11?"
-"Funny!" She praised with a feigned smile. -"Funny-funny-funny."
-"Isn’t it?"
-"That coming from a man who hates Kool-Aid just because he didn’t find a way to put eight cups of water into those tiny packages, and bakes chocolate chip cookies peeling M&Ms, one by one, from what I’ve heard." She laughed again.
-"You’ve heard wrong." He mumbled not knowing if he wanted to beat her or kiss her.
Feeling uncomfortable with his obstinate look, and running out of tirades, she headed to the door.
-"No way!" He grabbed her by one hand and pulled her back quickly turning her within his arms.
Her face flushed with his display of possessiveness, and her muscles tightened as his eyes met hers again.
-"I was quiet in my corner when you came pestering me, now face the music."
She was petrified.
Trying desperately to suppress his attraction for her he failed as his eyes were riveted to her mouth. His eyes consuming her with desire. The awkward silence was so thick that it could be cut with a knife. C.C.’s knees trembled at the fiery sensations he was causing her. Instinctively she avoided his gaze.
His warm breath was a heady invitation. He caressed her face with the tips of his fingers. -"Look at me." He whispered.
She yielded by the same instinct.
-"You have the prettiest eyes I’ve seen in a woman." He praised unexpectedly.
She swallowed hard.
He yearned to kiss her full, red lips but he knew if he took that first step, the family would starve that night. It was intolerable that closeness. He was losing his head, his control. He had to get away from her but he didn’t know when he would have that piece of jewelry that close again. That same old sexual tension was torture, funny during the years but becoming unbearable - for both of them - in the past months. He bent her face lower. She was surprisingly acquiescent and closed her eyes in anticipation. He brushed her lips with his, then nibbled at her chin lightly. She became a threat to his soul in that inappropriate time and place, and he knew it. He hated himself for what he was about to do, but he had to. He heard a muffled sound of satisfaction when his mouth traveled down her neck and over her ear. C.C. was opened to everything when she felt him lifting the hair from her nape as if searching something there. -"Where is it?" She heard him say. She opened her eyes and moaned in frustration. -"What are you doing?"
-"I’m looking for a valve stem."
She shot him a scathing look as she tried to push him away.
He kept her breathlessly crushed within his embrace.
-"Niles, I’m tired of your snapping! Lemme go."
-"Why?"
-"You know I hate "blonde jokes" and you continuously use them."
-"What "blonde jokes"?"
-"They are despicable jokes."
-"As far as I know they are not jokes. They are scientifically proven facts."
-"Look, you-…"
-"Shh!" He cut her off. -"By the way, we men find a great advantage in asking you out."
-"Which is?"
-"You don't know?"
-"No.."
-"We can park in handicapped zones."
She was fuming and hopelessly fighting to free herself from him. Her hair tousled to her face. -"You are hurting me." She insisted almost out of voice.
He knew he wasn’t and was determined to show her some real pain tightening her even more within his arms.
-"Ouch, Niles!"
-"I thought you were a sadist." He jested raising his eyebrow.
-"Where did you get that idea?"
-"Burt Bacharach and LEATHER?" Mentioning something she said on the phone once, unaware that it was the Butler on the other side of the line.
-"God, Niles, that was a joke." She answered impatiently. -"Leather?! Puh-lease!"
-"Mm, I don’t know…And what about Bacharach?"
-"Well, I like him. Is that a crime?"
-"Not at all. But he is too romantic to be your favorite."
-"I said I liked him. I didn’t say he was my favorite. By the way, remember when I met the guy at that audition here? Remember the disaster it was?"
He chuckled. -"I bet you are still looking for the way to San Jose."
She laughed in her throaty way as their eyes met again. Both smiles faded. Her body was sensually shaping itself to his, but motionless. Her feelings all discomposed. She was upset about what happened but still pleading for some kind of physical release. Making a quick move he held her tight by her waist with one arm while the other hand gently tucked her hair behind her ears - as he knew she would do. He held her more with his eyes than with his arms. He could read the despair on her face but it was almost dinnertime and he didn’t want to risk giving the family a free show. His body was demanding of him to carry her upstairs but again he knew that it was not the moment. If only she had been that open when they had met in the hall earlier that afternoon… A joyful smile slipped over his face, however, when for the first time after they had shared that kiss in the living room three years before, he felt she was still as crazy about him as he was about her.
She was annoyed by his confident smile but at the same time absolutely taken by that proximity.
Niles was losing his resistance again and he knew he couldn’t, at least not then, not there. -"You are unreal…" He whispered. -‘...and I want you like hell!’ He praised in his thoughts.
She somehow read that in his eyes and felt her skin burn.
He reluctantly set her free. -"Now, let me finish my duty or the folks in this house won’t get supper tonight."
Mad beyond description for being carried from full excitement to rigor mortis she turned on her heels, furiously tossed the empty bottle of water in the recycle can, and fled the room.
Niles leaned on the counter to collect his feelings. -"I think I’m gonna pay for this. She took it all wrong...Oh, G-OD!" He cried out sore with the messy sequence of events, then took a long breath and went back to his work but was unable to concentrate this time. He had to do something about his professional life, or perhaps nothing at all, but he couldn’t keep C.C. out of his heart anymore. That was driving him insane.
Suddenly he was hit by the memory of a theater play that he had written a few years earlier. The fluster that he almost got himself into when the, back then, "Miss Fine" found his list of criminal plots and almost sent him to jail as a serial killer. People are so judgmental and paranoiac sometimes, he thought. Meanwhile, he enjoyed writing and he should do that more often later. For now he would have to think quickly and do something about his future.
He smiled when thinking of Fran he saw her rushing into the kitchen, cutely rubbing her tummy.
-"Niles, sweetie, what are we going to have for dinner? My little Maxwell and Maxwella are stealing all my proteins, oy!" Then she stuck her head in the refrigerator.
-"Well, we’ll have-…"
-"Oh, never mind. Just surprise me. I will have to grab a nosh, anyways."
He shook his head.
-"Let’s see. Oo, yummy. This too…and these. Niles, what do you think if I ate-…"
-"Oh please, Mrs. Sheffield, spare me from seeing what odd food combination you’ll come up with next. Just tell me the antidote, and I’ll provide it later, okay?"
-"Sheesh, are we moody?" She said leaving everything in the same place and closing the door.
-"Oh, I’m sorry, Fran. It’s just that I met a certain German Shepherd a few minutes ago that bit me."
-"A German Shepherd?" She frowned looking around having no clue what he was saying.
-"Yeees, haven’t you seen?" He pointed at the door to the dining room.
-"Well, I saw something storming out of this room, but by the size of it I thought it was a Great Dane." She meant Miss Babcock but was not quite sure that was what he was talking about.
-"Mmm, maybe you are right." He pouted thoughtfully. -"I tried to bark in German but it didn’t work, perhaps I should have barked in Danish, for helvede!"
-"Niles, as I would say to Ma, I see your lips moving but I have no idea what you are talking about."
-"Oh, forget it. It’s just that Miss Babcock is driving me nuts."
She smiled. -"Well, you drove her nuts once. Give the woman a chance of revenge!"
He feigned a smile.
-"By the way what did you do to her? I saw the poor thing running off this place as the same submachine gun she always is, but seemed as though she was ready to use a full box of estrogen patches!" She fanned herself.
-"Seriously?"
-"I tell you, remember her reaction when she found out Ma was having an affair?" She pointed to the oven.
-"That desperate? Wowy!" He gladly smiled.
-"Worse." She took a pear from the bowl and started chewing it. -"She’s so weird, sometimes."
-"…‘Sometimes’?" He asked concentrating on his mushrooms. -"Speaking of "weird," do you want to hear something really odd?"
-"Nothing would surprise me anymore, but go ahead, try me." She muttered in between bites.
-"I had the strangest nightmare the other night and I forgot to tell you."
-"Dish." She watched his work attentively.
-"Okay, here goes…" He thought for a split second. -"I was an elf…the king of the elves, actually. My name was Elfis. I worked for Santa Claus who oddly looked exactly like Mr. Sheffield. The kids were there too. Especially Master Brighton, who showed up with you."
-"Me..? Oh, that reminds me of a dream that I once had with Max. We weren’t married yet. You know what?"
-"What?"
-"You were there too."
-"Me-me-me-me-me-me-me-me-me..?" He jested vocalizing.
-"You-you-you-you-you-you-you-you-you…" She answered in the same tone. -"Oh boy, the things you did with that feather duster-rrrr." She purred.
-"I think the intercom is off but should I check it?" He asked playfully.
-"No way. I’m a happily married woman now, Mister. That is as far as you’re gonna get."
-"Oh goody, I swear it is far more than I wanted to know. Feather duster, ay?"
-"Moving on…" She continued unable to conceal a curt smile. -"So, Santa, elves…Was it Christmas in your dream?"
-"No, we were all dressed up to spend Carnival in Rio."
-"Come on…" She hit him on the arm.
-"Where was I..? Oh, and so you and Master Brighton were swept up into a blizzard and carried to the North Pole."
-"And?"
-"And listen to this, there was this horrendous creature called "C.C. The Abominable Babcock." She was a huge cloud with Miss Babcock's face."
-"Sweetie, are you sure these mushrooms are edible?"
He chuckled. -"Oh, it gets worse..!"
-"Niles, to see pink elephants and flying pigs is not that bad. But you can get really hurt when you try to ride them, I tell you."
He raised his eyebrow in a "may I continue?" stare.
-"Sorry. What about the creature?"
-"Well, all the abominable creature wanted was to mess with our Christmas by creating a snowstorm to prevent Santa from delivering the presents."
-"Oy.."
-"But you came up with the idea to set a date between her and the Rain Man."
-"Let me guess, another cloud with Dustin Hoffman’s face?"
-"And voice.."
-"Hahhh!" She burst into laughter.
-"I just don’t understand one thing."
-"What?"
-"It was a dream where even Chester spoke. Like these kids cartoons."
-"Oooh, how cute! I would love to see that!"
-"Yes. It was funny. By the way he was yours instead of Miss Babcock’s."
-"Meanwhile, it was a dream. Animals can talk in a dream."
-"I know but I wonder why one of Santa’s reindeers, and especially the one named Vixen…" He hesitated.
-"What? What?!"
-"..had also Miss Babcock’s voice?"
-"You ask me! Are you sure it was her?"
-"The voice was sweet and delicate but it was her. I could recognize that voice even in a scratched-out-of-speed-78 R.P.M. record." His eyes far.
-"I would think of that as perhaps a bonus from your subconscious."
-"Oh, then I'll be in huge trouble because there was this strange reindeer - "Dancer" - that had my voice too. Baby remember my name, remember…remember." Sheepishly singing the words he vaguely recalled and shaking his head at the thought.
Skeptical. -"You know, Niles, in the salad you are supposed to use vinegar, olive-oil, dressing…Never vodka, rum, or gin."
He chuckled.
-"Now, if you want my opinion, a vixen with Miss Babcock’s voice was definitely a bonus of your subconscious."
-"Thanks, Princess of Tides."
-"Ask Freud, Honey."
-"Oh forget it! I’m sure it was just a very confusing dream."
-"If it was not the mushrooms…Say, did you change the blend of your tea or bought some exotic spice from some South American country lately?"
-"NO.."
-"Well, then just try not to eat too much chocolate cake before you go to sleep, okay? Oo, which reminds me, where is the Häagen-Dazs?"
-"Your adopted foreign child?"
-"Oh, Maxwell forbade me to even mention that after we got married. I think it’s because it almost got me behind bars."
-"Yes, SlimFast bars."
-"Don’t start with me Niles."
He grinned.
-"Meanwhile, where is the ice-cream?"
-"Remember Sylvia’s visit this morning?"
-"The whole carton box?"
-"MmHmm.."
-"She’s on a diet! She knows she’s not supposed to eat that!"
-"Oh, give the woman a rest. She was blabbering something about Morty. Are your parents still having problems?"
-"Not that I know. After she dumped that Doc with Joe Bologna’s looks, they’ve been apparently living in a never-ending honeymoon." Under her breath. -"Gee, if that was not trouble enough."
He chuckled again. -"She wanted to talk to you, but you were out with Miss Grace."
-"Yeah. Well, I’ll talk to her tomorrow. Oh, I ate that pear but I’m still hungry."
-"Here, take this tuna sandwich. It was for me but after Miss Babcock’s visit I lost my appetite."
-"Are you sure?"
-"Yes."
-"About your appetite, I mean. It seems that every time that blonde is around, you seem to lose everything but your appetite."
-"Oh, just shoot me! All that thing gives me is hepatitis, never appetite."
-"I tell ya, I may be able to put that Eternity puzzle together, but I will never understand you guys."
Niles sighed. -"Dear God in Heaven!"
-"Wanna talk about it?"
-"About what?" Disguising.
-"About nuclear physics, what else...? Oy, forget it…" Taking a huge bite of her sandwich. -"Yummy.."
-"Fran!" Brighton called from upstairs.
-"I'm coming, Sweetieeee!"
Niles frowned at the high pitch. Impressed by her voracity towards the bread he advised. -"Dinner will be ready in a couple of minutes. Can you wait until then?"
-"With this thing, I guess so. Are you okay, Niles?"
-"Yes. It’s just-just a headache that’s all. Actually, if you don’t mind I need to be alone for awhile."
-"I gotta check on Brighton, anyways. He was blabbering something about Harvard. I wonder what that can be?"
-"Do you think the German Shepherd will stay for dinner?"
-"Like I said I have no idea what you did to Miss Babcock but she almost ran over me with her purse in one hand and fanning herself with the other. I think she went home."
-"Good." The last thing he needed at that moment was her presence in the same room. He had his share for the day.
-"Niles, no matter what you say you don’t seem okay at all. If you need me."
-"Thank you." He nodded with another deep sigh and a bitter smile.
-"I’ll be upstairs with B."
-"All right." He said rotating his neck hoping to ease the tension away.
-"Mom!" Brighton insisted from upstairs.
-"I’m coming, I’m coming!" She mumbled disconnected words while walking upstairs. -"And tha-nks for the nosh Ni-les!" She yelled with her mouth full just before disappearing.
-"You’re welcome!" He mimicked her voice tone.
Setting the table a couple of minutes later the Butler had another idea about those theater plays. He had a good friend who also wrote them. The man was not a professional, but wrote rather well for a hobby. Perhaps he had something Niles could offer to Mr. Sheffield, which he hopefully would be interested in producing it with him.
He called his friend to make sure he would be at his place after dinner, but didn’t say a thing. He wanted to exchange some ideas first. It sounded a little farfetched, but it could also mean something. Besides, no matter the results, he had decided to talk to Miss Babcock in a different way. All he had to do was wait a couple of weeks more.
C.C. got home struggling for calm and buried in frustration - hating the man that almost made her the happiest woman on Earth. Her head was spinning; what a day she had.
She poured herself a drink and went to the bathroom. Sitting on the edge of her Jacuzzi she watched as the water started flowing. All those events served to show her at least one thing, her love for him was still strong; she could not deny it. She still desired that man with all her body and spirit and she could not fight it. But how about him?
Like a sleepwalker she took off her clothes and got into the tub. Taking another sip of her scotch she felt her stomach churn. Her life all of a sudden seemed upside down again, a whole afternoon of mixed messages almost culminating in a blissful upshot but ending in a heartsick night again.
She then recalled when Sarah’s parents came to visit Max recently; shocked by the news that Fran was adopting the kids. The Blonde became very sad with the memories they both brought with them. The surprising thing was Fran’s reaction. She noticed how sad C.C. became and did everything in her reach to get her out of the house and away from them. She even asked Niles to take her out for dinner one night. Surprisingly; he accepted "the challenge" and was in fact very charming and attentive. -‘The restaurant he chose was incredible! Then we went out dancing…’ She sighed at the memory.
It was a fabulous night except when she invited him for a last drink in her penthouse as part of a possible seduction plan, he dryly said "no." She loathed that strong-minded attitude of his. Damn pledge! Was he ever in love with her or just playing with her emotions over the years?
She thought of Fran again. The way she felt intimidated by the brunette’s looks at first. However, that fear wasn’t directed to her business partner, as everybody else might think, but because of the man she really loved; they were too close.
-"I hate him!" She let out loud, desperately trying to brush his face away from her mind. -‘Who’s fooling who?’ She thought dispiritedly. -"It’s useless…I need that man like I need the freaking air that I breathe."
She then watched her naked figure and wondered - she was confused about him but one thing she knew for sure. It was amazing the way Niles had the power to make her feel more feminine and desirable in spite of his remarks. She was a natural beauty, like the ones that won’t need too much make-up to impress a man. However, with the exception of very few displays of affection, or passion for that matter, their love had been platonic for as long as she could remember. What if she could not correspond to his expectations if the right time came?
Her thoughts were going round and round in circles; most of them difficult to face. She recalled the day in Maxwell’s house when her father came for a visit and she almost missed the opportunity to go out with him if it hadn’t been for, again, Fran. Secretly she had to admit that the woman was very generous and deserved all the happiness she was experiencing. Fran gave up the concert of her life so C.C. could be with her "Daddy." She also remembered what she attempted to do to Niles that same afternoon when he implied that the man of her life should literally be blown and then set on a chair next to her for dinner. She sneaked Brighton’s baseball bat out of Max’s den and almost shattered the Butler’s skull into pieces. Luck was with him and he heard her coming in time to stop her. She chuckled at the memory of what came next, which became a secret between the two of them. -"Oh, boy…" She bit her lip. Niles became so mad at the Blonde that he literally put her in his lap and hit her fanny hard a couple of times. She, as a payback, nearly broke his knee with a saltshaker during dinner later that day. Oh, that day… The most important thing about that day she only got to know in recent years while talking to her father on the phone. Stewart told her that he actually had asked Niles’ opinion if he thought appropriated to take his daughter out after he had invited Fran. To which Niles replied feeling his patience at its lowest ebb: -"Mr. Babcock, I just saw your daughter dressed in that gorgeous pearly white evening gown. With all due respect, sir, get that stunning woman out of here if you don’t want me to lock you in that bathroom and take her to that concert myself in spite of my hurting foot and my partially smashed knee." C.C. grinned; she would have paid a million dollars to see her daddy’s illustrious face at the time.
She thought of Niles again and how he got back to his incredible shape. She knew he was not exactly the material for a front cover of a male fashion magazine anymore, not by today’s standards at least, but she couldn’t forget the way those "super-unnatural" floozies hovered around him like flies as soon as he got to that shooting session in that hardhat costume. Michael was the model guy there but those women only seemed to have eyes for the Soda Jerk. -"God, can a man be more magnetic?" She shivered angrily. -"Ah, that stupid deep blue eyes-baritone velvet voice-sexy smile-stubborn chin-charming English southpaw, will pay me for today!" She furiously said all in the same breath. -"Ohhh, he will!"
She felt a horrible mix of hate and self-pity as tears started running down her face. She was so tired of suffering because of him. -"It’s not love…It’s not love but the most vile and despicable rancor, that’s what he feels for me. Why does he hate me so much? It can’t be love." She buried her face in her arms and sobbed loudly. In between gasps all she could think of was how his mouth felt good on hers and the way he still had the power to drive her out of control. She dove her head for a few seconds and enjoyed the warmth of the water in contrast with her frozen soul.
-"He’s gonna have it for making me suffer so much." She gasped coming up for air.
* * * * * * *
The dinner was pleasant that night, except for Fran scanning his face from time to time; trying to understand why he remained so nervous. If she only knew he’d been suppressing those feelings for C.C. Babcock for over twenty years she would certainly flip or at least would never complain about those "five years" ever again.
After dinner he left for his friend’s place. He had a nice time over there but the excitement of getting home early and reading the play he chose more thoroughly prevented him from staying until late. His cab dropped him off around the mansion but he decided to take a drink someplace else before he hit home. He was familiar with the elements a play needed to have in order to become a success and he felt that he had a hit on his hands. Niles promised his friend that he would call him again if he could find anyone to produce it.
He sat there at the bar thinking of the future. They were soon to move to California, Miss Margaret close to a serious engagement, Master Brighton having plans towards Harvard, Max and Fran were radiant with the twins, and the world was Miss Grace’s oyster. It was his turn for happiness and that sick "pre-engagement" with the Blonde had lasted long enough… -‘Talking about disturbing?’ He gave a crooked smile filled with hope. -‘Okay, here is another pledge.’ He added in his thoughts. -‘No matter what happens to this play, or the consequences I will have to face after what happened in that kitchen today… No matter what, I’ll grab that gorgeous Pit Bull by the ears and I’ll tug her before a priest one of these days.’
The barman watched Niles’ smile from behind the counter.
-"Mmm, let’s see…Two World Wars, a Polish Pope, and now this. If Babcock and I together won’t be another biblical sign of the Apocalypse, I don’t know what will." He wondered out loud with another grin. Then he signaled to the bartender his tip on the counter, and left happily.
To be continued…
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