Conception

by

Anakin
(anakin.david@free.fr)

Fran sat in the doctor’s office, waiting for her to finish reading her tests results.

"Fran, the nausea and the drowsiness you’ve been experiencing for a week is something perfectly normal in your condition!" she said triumphantly.

"What do you mean ‘my condition’"? Fran asked, suddenly worried.

"About 3 women out of 4 experience morning sickness, all women feel drowsy in the first trimester…"

"Wait a second, what exactly are you saying?!" Fran exclaimed, her mind reeling.

Dr. Rosenberg smiled.

"Fran, you’re pregnant…"

It was like a cold shower: ‘pregnant?’… How could that be?

"Pregnant?... That’s impossible!"

“Well, that’s what the tests show. Your β-HCG levels are those of a pregnant woman…"

"But I had my period last month…"

"You know, some women still have a slight bleeding in the three or four first months."

"How is it possible, I’m not currently involved with anybody!"

"One time only is enough…"

Fran was beginning to panic.

"There wasn’t ANY ‘one tim…’" she stopped mid sentence. "Oh my God!..."

"What?"

"No, that’s not true, that’s not possible!" she said aloud to herself.

"You remember something?"

"Yes I… Oh my God!" she repeated. "Is there a test to know the father?"

"Well a DNA test will do that as soon as the baby is born, if you wish and if the potential father agrees too."

"Isn’t it possible to get it sooner?"

"You could still have an amniocentesis, but if you don’t require it for any further reasons, genetic reasons for instance, I definitely wouldn’t recommend it…"

"What am I going to do!" Fran exclaimed, more to herself than to anybody.

"If you don’t want it, it’s still soon enough to get an abortion…"

"No!" she shouted, her hand automatically reaching her abdomen in a protective gesture.

Dr. Rosenberg sighed.

"The decision is still yours. What I am capable of telling you for sure right now, is that the baby must be about 6-7 weeks old, everything seems to be all right, but for further information about the baby’s health, you would have to go see a gynecologist. I can set an appointment for you if you like…"

"Yes, please…"

"I’ll call Dr. Stevenson then, he’s a great professional, and he’s particularly well appreciated, but if you prefer a woman, I can call Dr. Erin – she’s great too…"

"If I may have the choice, I’d prefer a woman, then…"

The doctor smiled.

"It’s the greatest adventure of all you’ve embarked yourself on, Fran… If you know the father, I think you should tell him as soon as possible and then you can decide what to do."

"I won’t get an abortion, and that’s final, doctor."

"I didn’t mean that… You have to think about when the baby’s born…"

"I know…"

~~~~~~~~~~

Fran shut the entrance door as another wave of nausea threatened to send her to the bathroom.

As he was coming from the corridor to see who had entered, Niles noticed her discomfort.

"Miss Fine, are you all right?"

"Yes Niles, thank you… Is Mr. Sheffield in his office?"

"Yes, he was with Miss Babcock discussing over some actors’ contracts…"

"I have to see him…"

"Something I should know about?" he asked mischievously.

Fran smiled sympathetically.

"Not now Niles… But I bet you’ll know soon enough…"

Niles pouted.

"This is very serious, Niles. You’ll know, I promise, but Mr. Sheffield has to know first…"

Niles looked at her frowning, then nodded understandingly.

"Of course, miss Fine… I’ll see to it that Miss Babcock doesn’t bother you. I think they are finished with what they were doing anyway…"

"Thank you Niles." She smiled.

She put her coat and handbag in the closet, and headed for the office.

Just as she was about to enter, Miss Babcock and Niles exited arguing. The latter winked at her, and she shut the door behind her.

"Oh, Miss Fine! Was there something you wanted to talk about?" he said amiably.

‘At least he seems to be in a good mood’ she thought before sitting on the love seat.

"Mr. Sheffield, I have something to tell you…"

"Why don’t you come tell me on your favorite spot?" he said smiling, patting the corner of his desk.

"No, I’d rather not…"

He frowned.

"Something serious?"

"We can say that, yes…"

He stood up, toured his desk and came to sit next to her.

"Does it have to do with your visit at the doctor’s?"

"How did you…"

"Niles told me." He interrupted.

She sighed.

"Oy I tell you, nobody can do anything in this house without YentaKing knowing… Anyway… Mr. Sheffield, this is very hard for me to say…"

"Go ahead Miss Fine, I’m listening."

"I’m… I’m pregnant."

A look of utter surprise drew itself on Maxwell’s face.

"You what?" he blew unbelievingly.

"… And I think you’re the father…" she blurted out.

"WHAT?!!" he stood up. "Miss Fine, that’s impossible! What are you trying to do?! Two people are necessary to conceive a baby! Two people have to share a bed for… Oh my God!"

He sat back, stunned. "You’re not saying…"

Fran breathed in slowly.

"I am not involved with anybody at the moment, Mr. Sheffield. I was not a month and a half ago either, and since Mona’s party, I haven’t taken any evening out… There’s only one possibility…"

"Please, say it’s not the one I think about…"

"I wish I could…"

Maxwell closed his eyes frowning.

"Mr. Sheffield, I am keeping the baby…"

"What?... Oh… This is not something I could ask for…"

"My decision is made, I know you don’t want it…"

"Oh, no!" he interrupted. "I mean I would never ask you to abort…"

"Oh… So you want the baby?" she asked hopeful, but deeply surprised.

"Let’s not be hasty…"

She fell silent trying to ponder the decisions she had to make.

Her thoughts were interrupted.

"Miss Fine, are you absolutely sure I am the father?"

She sighed, annoyed.

"If you want we can have a DNA test as soon as the baby is born. In the meantime, the doctor said I was 6-7 weeks pregnant, which is exactly the date Mona had her party. You fill in the blanks…"

"You got drunk, you could have gone with a man at that party, or a man could have taken advantage of…"

"Mr. Sheffield, it was a girls’ only party." She interrupted. "… And I know I was drunk, but do you think my mother has raised an easy girl? I’m not a tramp despite what all the people say!" She paused. "Look, I understand you don’t want that baby, you don’t have to do anything for it, the only thing I ask of you, is keep me at your service until the pregnancy is too far along and I cannot work anymore, period."

She stood up and headed for the door, but he was quicker than she was.

"What are you saying I don’t want the baby?"

"Well you’ve made it pretty obvious…"

"I never said that."

"No, but you’re asking for proofs, and don’t believe what I say, I thought you knew me better, Maxwell Sheffield!"

"Well don’t you think it’s normal?... I mean you come into my office and tell me I’m the father of your unborn child, I have no conscious recollection of any physical encounter with you, so yes, I do have doubts!"

"…"

"Now could we discuss this calmly?"

She started for the love seat again, where he joined her.

"That night… We were both in an unusual state. That should never have happened…"

"Look, if it was so unpleasant to you, we can very well…"

"Oh for Heavens’ sake, it’s NOT what I mean!" he interrupted.

"Look Mr. Sheffield, maybe we should take some time to think about what we’re going to do. It is obvious that if we cannot manage to find some kind of agreement, I won’t be able to stay at your service as I first thought."

He sighed.

"Miss Fine, when are you going to stop jumping to conclusions? I am rather caught by surprise there, try to understand my position! 5 minutes ago I was your employer, and now I am the father of our child! I’d say it’s a huge change in our lives!"

She stood up.

"That’s why I’ll let you think about it. I’ll be in my room if you need me."

She exited the office and shut the door, leaving a thoughtful Maxwell.

He had been absorbed in his thoughts for a rather long time, when Niles came in bringing tea.

"Ah, Niles, tea is a very good idea… Help yourself a cup too…"

"Ooooh, I’m guessing someone’s been very bad…"

"Would you get off that track?... It’s not what you think, Niles, or rather yes it is, but not the way you think it is…"

Niles was a bit at a loss.

"What do you mean, Sir?"

"I don’t think I can tell you exactly what it is now, Niles… It’s something very private between me and Fran…"

Maxwell’s use of his nanny’s first name didn’t escape Niles. He frowned.

"Miss Fine came in rather puzzled after her visit to the doctor’s, I hope it’s not serious?"

"It is, but not the way you think it is… I guess I need to sort some things out… WE need to sort things out…"

"Is Miss Fine’s position in danger?"

"In a way, her position here might change, yes…"

Niles was suddenly really worried.

"Oh, Sir, you know how she is… She may mess things up, but it always turns out good in the end…"

"This time I’m not sure, Niles… We have to talk a lot and make our minds on a very serious matter. What happened is going to change our whole lives…"

"Then I think you should talk to her…"

"Yes, you’re right on this point, Niles… I’ll go talk to her right now…. Thanks for the tea, old man…" he said, smiling slightly.

He got up, and headed upstairs, leaving a very worried Niles behind.

He reached the landing, and headed directly for her room. When faced with the closed door, he hesitated one moment, then softly knocked.

"Come in…"

He opened the door silently, then stepped inside and shut it behind him.

She was seated on her bed, and looked at him questioningly.

He smiled faintly, and sat next to her.

"Miss Fine… Fran…" he stopped and looked at her smiling a little. "I might as well call the mother of my child by her first name…" he said, joking a little to lighten the atmosphere.

She smiled faintly, he encircled her shoulders from the side, and resumed.

"I thought the memories I had were only heavy medicine induced fantasies…" he said in a low voice. "… but then again, I guess it explains our respective moods the next day, doesn’t it?"

She nodded, seeking comfort against his chest.

"Fran, I don’t think I’m ready for this…"

He felt her stiffen in his embrace, but he tightened it in a reassuring gesture.

"… but I guess 7 or 8 months will be enough for me to be."

She relaxed and looked at him hopeful.

He ran the back of his finger against her cheek.

"Fran, I’m not as irresponsible or thoughtless as you might think I am. It is very sudden, but I’m asking you to be my wife…"

Fran felt a pang in her chest. He was not marrying her for love, he was marrying her because she was carrying his child! A wave of nausea invaded her.

"Mr. Sheffield, I’m not asking for your pity." She said coldly. "You don’t have to marry me because of this child."

"What?" he frowned.

"Don’t worry, we won’t be a bother to you, I’m not even asking for financial support."

"Oh God, why do pregnant women have to be so touchy!... I’m not asking you to marry me because of this child!... And even if that were the case, what would be so bad about it?!"

She looked at him coldly.

"I don’t want to marry a guy who doesn’t love me."

"And who says it’s not the case?"

"Then why don’t you say it?!"

The room suddenly fell silent.

"I don’t think I can now, Fran…"

"See?!... You…"

"Fran, stop it right there!..." He sighed. "I don’t think I can now, because there are way too many things on my mind at the moment… But… Maybe… Maybe fate has given us a sign? I don’t know… You know I am attracted to you, but is that love?... I knew love once, and I suffered enormously because of it… Am I ready for another love?... I don’t know, Fran… I am terrified, and… Strange as it may appear to you, I’m still in love with Sara, and somehow, I always will…"

He stopped a moment, absorbed in his thoughts.

"… I guess I understand…" she said in a low voice.

"… But that doesn’t mean I can’t love you… I’m a little confused... A LOT confused…"

They remained silent a moment.

"What do you say we first try to get to know each other better… I mean I know you, but I know you as my nanny… A beautiful nanny, a very feminine and sexy nanny, but somehow we’ve always kept a boss-nanny relationship… Granted, a strange one, but not really a man to woman relationship…"

She seemed to relax a bit.

"Fran, why don’t we try to know each other as a man and a woman, and see what happens?"

"What about the children?"

"I think it’s wise not to tell them right now. Of course we’ll tell them soon, but I guess we have some work to do around each other first."

"I’m going to show soon…"

"You’re what, one month and a half, two month pregnant? Give it another two month before it really shows. Sara started showing after her fourth month for Maggie… It’s your first child…"

"Tell me about her?"

"Who?"

"Sara…"

He sighed deeply.

"She was the first woman I met when I arrived in New York… I was trying to start as a theater producer, and I thought I should start again like what I was doing in London just before I left… So I scanned the universities and tried to contact every theater club or theater department head I could find, and the third or fourth I called was a certain Sara Mac Arthur… She took my offer and we met after her classes. She was about four years younger than me. She was bright, vivacious, and beautiful. She immediately captured my heart like no other girl had ever done before. Apparently I made a rather positive impression on her too, and we started dating. The play was a success and gave me the opportunity to meet with the big Broadway fish, so to speak… We got engaged – against my mother’s will I might add – we married three months later, and in the 12 years that followed, we lived a perfect life… We were very happy, I was more of a family man then, than I was when you first came here, Fran… Then she started to feel tired for no reason, and when she finally accepted to run medical tests, a simple blood sample revealed that she had a very rare form of leukemia, very virulent..."

He finished the last words with difficulty.

"Two months later, she was gone…"

She squeezed his hands, and there was a long moment of silence, then he resumed.

"Fran, she was the love of my life, and she’s gone… I’m not sure I can allow myself o love again like I loved Sara. So yes, I am partly asking you to marry me because of our child. You have to give me a little time for the rest. But you’ve got to know that I have feelings for you… Deep… Feelings… What about you?"

She took her time to answer.

"I do too… When you first kissed me at the end of your premiere last year, I was deeply troubled, and I realized it was not only because my boss had kissed his nanny. Then when you first showed a tape with Sara on mother’s day, I felt that love you shared, and I wanted to hold you, hug you, comfort you, and give you that love you were so suddenly deprived of… When we took care of little Joshua, and Gracie asked those questions about us having a child…" she stroked her belly, smiling tenderly "… I realized I wanted to carry your child one day, that I wanted to be your wife… When you kissed me while rehearsing ‘Romeo & Juliette’… I thought I want to be kissed like that everyday by this man… And when you said you valued my opinion on national television, I thought boy, this man really cares about me!... Or when you came to salvage me at the camp kindervelt reunion… Oh, Mr. Sheffield, there are so many times, so many moments between us… Yes I guess I am in love with you…"

He smiled tenderly, and stroked her cheek with his hand softly. She sighed heavily.

"… But I guess it’s a good idea to try to know each other better too…"

He smiled again, and softly kissed her mouth.

"… Then why don’t you start by calling me by my first name?..."

~~~~~~~~

Maxwell was nervous.

He was seated next to Fran as she was having her first ultrasound.

His hands were wet with anxiety, and he was not entirely certain he wanted to be there. Sure, in the 4 weeks that had followed her announcement, they had gone out together, done things together, but their relationship was still on an awkward mode. They needed to do something about it, soon…

His thoughts were suddenly interrupted by the flickering of the screen and the moving image transmitted by the probe.

"So, what do we have here?" the doctor started. "Wow! Look at that!... ‘Seems you have a very vivacious little fellow in there, Fran!"

Fran was overjoyed, yes, she could see the small human form tossing and rolling in the small nest it had itself created. She turned to watch Maxwell, a huge smile on her face.

Maxwell was mesmerized. He felt a warm feeling rise in his core, and his heart beat faster… The miracle of life had caught them both by surprise, but now he saw a pattern to it: he was going to be a father again, he had given life again, and he… could start living again…

His eyes met Fran’s and without thinking, he softly bent and laid a kiss on her mouth, while the doctor carried on with her investigation.

The next few minutes, they were both so engrossed in what had just exploded between them, that all they heard was that the baby was in perfect health, and that all the structural and biological signs so far, were excellent. They lived the end of the examination in a daze, both feeling extremely joyful.

He helped her dress, and escorted her outside. No word was spoken, but in the limousine, he could not resist kissing her deeply.

"Fran… Now I think it’s a good time to tell the children. Tonight is Niles’s night off and he’s going to his butlers’ association evening, I’ll ask him to prepare something we can deal with alone, and we’ll tell them at dinner."

"Maxwell… I am scared…!" She said, snuggling up against him.

He tightened his embrace.

"Scared of what?" he murmured reassuringly, kissing her forehead lightly.

"Scared of how they’re going to react, they’ve known me a couple of years only…"

"You know they adore you…"

"That’s not the only thing I’m scared of… I’m scared about us… What if it doesn’t work out between us? I mean we’re both attracted to each other, but will that be enough?... We do not belong to the same worlds, we have very little in common…"

He sighed, resting his head against hers.

"Yes, you’re right, Fran… But I also think it is up to us to make it work… I know I want, despite all my fears of losing someone I care deeply for…"

She kept silent, then looked him in the eyes.

"I guess I want it too…"

"Marry me?"

"Yes…"

They kissed softly, just as the driver told them they were home…

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