Misunderstanding

by

Delph
(dolfins@worldnet.fr)

Fran comes in the kitchen looking terrible. Niles glances up and sees  her. He smiles.

Niles: … Coffee Mrs. Sheffield?

Fran: … Yes Niles, thank you… God I have a heck of a headache this morning!

Niles: Would you like an aspirin?

Fran: No I can't…It's not good for the baby… But I guess I can take ibuprofen thank you…

Niles: I see… not the best time …

Fran: Yeah… Oh I hate being so cranky and feeling terrible, and I hate having hormones!… Ahhh what the Hell is he doing?!… BRIGHTON!!!

Niles shuts his eyes painfully and shakes his head to wipe away the buzz he has now in both ears…

Brighton: [from upstairs] Huh… I'm coming Fran… Gotta do something and I'm right there…

Fran: [shouting] Well hurry up sweetie!… You're gonna be late!…

Niles has put both his hands over his ears. Then he gives her a cup of coffee.

Fran: Thank you Niles…

She pours milk in her coffee, adds some sugar, and sips slowly. Niles behind her is doing the washing up, and he whistles a small tune.

Fran: Niles…

Niles: Yes?

Fran: Stop whistling…

Niles: Oh sorry Fran…

Fran: Thank you…

She drinks her coffee and munches a cookie. After a moment, she turns around to look at the clock.

Fran: All right, now that's enough…!

She stands up and heads for the stairs.

She arrives on the landing and walks to Brighton's bedroom. She stops before the door hearing strange noises. She listens more carefully and hears heavy sighs from a man and a woman. Her eyes flutter wide open and she opens the door…

… Only to discover that Brighton is watching an X-rated videotape!

Brighton stands up hurriedly, blushing and his fingers groping with the remote control.

Brighton: M… Mom?!… Well I… I told you I would come down in a minute!

Fran: Don't try to change the subject Brighton!… Where did you get this?!

Brighton: Well…

Fran: You'd better have a good explanation mister, because I don't think your father is going to be as patient as I am right now!

Brighton: Huh?… That's what you call patient Mom?…

Brighton: All right, all right…Steve gave it to me… His brother rented it and he told me there were some interesting things to see…

Fran: 'Interesting things to see'?… Are you kidding?!… Now you go to school mister, ask Niles to give you a glass of orange juice and some cookies you'll eat on your way to school 'cause you are already late, but don't worry, we'll discuss it later with Maxwell!… And it's gonna be a heck of a time for you Mister!… Wrong moment for me either!

Brighton bends his head ashamed, takes his bag, and goes to the kitchen. Fran retrieves the tape from the VCR, puts it in its box, and exits Brighton's room. She goes to her room, leaves the tape on the bed, and goes to the bathroom where she starts washing herself.

Max comes in the bedroom seeking his wife.

Max: Fran?

He hears her brushing her teeth in the bathroom and smiles. He proceeds through the room but he spots the tape on the bed covers and stops. He takes it and looks at the cover. His face turns instantly red.

She comes out of the bathroom with a worried look. She has a towel around her hair. He looks at her with a most angry look, holding the tape in one hand.

Max: I thought I was all you needed to fulfil your fantasies, I can see plainly I am not!!!… What were you doing with this?!

Fran: Oh you found it…

Max: Yes I found it and I was not the LEAST happy about it!!! Now?… What are you going to say for your defense?

Fran: Calm down Honey… It's Brighton's…

Max: WHAT?!… And tell me how I am supposed to CALM DOWN?!!!!! Either you're lying to me and taking my son as an excuse, or you're saying my son is some kind of pervert!!!!!!!

Fran: Now you listen to me! It's not YOUR son, it's OUR son, and YES, the tape's Brighton's!… Well… One of Brighton's friends…

Max: Fran, I knew you had a greater libido than I do, but that!… How could you?!

Fran: I take it that you don't believe me?… That you think it was I who rented this dirty tape?

Max: I don't know, I'm confused…

Fran: You're confused?!… Why don't you trust me?! You think I am that pervert?!

Max: No! Of course not, Fran! And yes, I trust you!

Fran: Well then if you trust me, listen VERY carefully: I DID NOT RENT THIS VIDEOTAPE, AND I HAD NO OTHER INTENTION THAN TO WITHDRAW IT FROM BRIGHTON'S ROOM UNTIL HE GIVES IT BACK TO HIS FRIEND!!!

Max: You don't need to SHOUT AT ME LIKE YOU DO, I'M NOT DEAF!… And how would I know you didn't rent this tape and take my son as an excuse?!

Fran: Is that so?… Well Mister, you'll deal with YOUR son and YOUR conscience alone 'cause I'm going to my mother's!

Max: Why?

Fran: It's a wrong time for me, and I need REST, and I have a HECK OF A HEADACHE and I CAN'T BEAR CRIES!!! Call me when you're calmer and ready to hear what I have to say about all this!

[AUTHOR'S NOTE: she's just slammed the door of the bathroom… Sorry for your ears, I know this last passage has been painful… It won't happen again I promise…]

Max remains in his room, tossing inadvertently the tape in his hand. Then he grabs it firmly and goes to his office.

Fran has troubles fixing her hair properly in the bathroom, she looks like a wild lion actually, and even her make up is not as good as it can be. She grimaces before the mirror both because she hates what she sees, and because the brush is hurting her skull's skin…

Fran: Oh heck!

She throws the brush in the washbasin and combs her rebellious hair with her fingers. She puts a baggy sweater on, then a pair of jeans, and exits the bathroom and then the house.

Max is in his office, standing before the French doors. C.C. is talking to him, but he is not listening. Suddenly, he turns towards her with a most preoccupied look.

Max: C.C., may I ask you a question?

C.C.: Of course Maxwell!

Max: I mean a personal question…

C.C.: Huh?… Well… Maybe you can ask but then I'm not sure I can answer…

Max: All right… Do you find me attractive?

C.C. opens her eyes like saucepans.

C.C.: Huh?… Y… Yes!… Of course you are attractive! She stammers.

Max: I mean am I sexy?… Am I exciting?

C.C. is more and more uneasy, she blushes.

C.C.: Well… Maxwell… you know I had a crush on you but I won't go after a married man…

Max: What?!… I'm not talking about that at all!… I simply asked you this because you are a woman and you are my friend!… I never implied that I wanted to… Huh! Well that was a bad idea, excuse me…

C.C.: [relieved] No problem Maxwell… Yes you are…

Max: What?

C.C.: … Sexy…

Max: Oh…Thanks…Well… I need a break… Why don't you take your afternoon?…

C.C.: Yes… That would be a good idea…

At that moment, Niles comes in with a tray for tea.

C.C.: … I had to go to the hairdresser, that'll be a perfect opportunity…

Niles: For you daily body shave?

C.C.: What?

Niles: What, King Kong was not your brother?

Maxwell looks skywards.

C.C.: Well it's better than being Nessie's brother…See you tomorrow Maxwell…See you sometime butler boy…

She exits. Niles brings his tea to his employer.

Max: Niles… Do you think I am sexy?

Niles: Sir!… It's not for me to say!

Max: Of course it is not… Sorry, I'm confused… I caught Fran with a dirty tape…

Niles: Wrong statement Sir…Did you actually see her watching it?

Max: No… She said it was Brighton's…

Niles: … Correct Sir…

Max: … But how do I know… Hey!… Now Niles that's enough!… I'd appreciate some privacy now that we are married!

Niles: What is that supposed to mean?

Max: …That you were listening to the doors once again!

Niles: Sir!… I did not!

Max: Yes you did…

Niles: I absolutely did not!!!!

Max: Then how is it that you know about this tape?

Niles: I saw it yesterday evening when I collected the dirty clothes in master Brighton's bedroom!… I needed to grab a sock from underneath his bed and there it was!

Max: All right, all right… But then how do you know that she's not watched it?

Niles: For several reasons Sir, and the first one is that she loves your more than I would ever imagine someone could love someone else, the second is that… Well… I don't think that she needs anymore excitement than the one you're obviously providing her, and the third is that she didn't have the time to do that this morning, the tape was in master Brighton's bedroom yesterday night, and you spent the whole night with her right?

Max sighed.

Max: You have a point…

Niles: Of course I have a point!

Max: It seems that I have made a mountain out of a molehill again…

Niles: Why?

Max: She's gone to her mother's…

Niles looks skywards and sighs.

Niles: What have I done to deserve such a fate?!… Look, I'm not a marital adviser, but I suggest you call her and present your deepest apologies… Now if you'll excuse me, I've got some work to do…

Maxwell remains alone in his office. After some time, he picks up his phone and dials a number.

Sylvia: Hello?

Max: Hello Sylvia… Is Fran there?

Sylvia: Of course she's here!… Next time, give it a try… Trust her!

Max: I will, I promise Sylvia.

Fran: Hello?

Max: I don't know how to put this Fran, but please, accept my deepest apologies… I was blinded by my stupid male pride and I simply forgot that I had a wonderful and loving wife who would never do such a thing to me because she loves me in a way I don't deserve…

Fran: [sigh]… Okay… I accept your apologies… But you'll still have to deal with Brighton without me 'cause I don't feel comfortable with that at all!

Max: I'll have a better chance if you are by my side sweetheart… Won't you come home?

Fran: I'll be home in the end of the afternoon, I need to discuss things with Ma about pregnancy and all that…

Max: [whining] In the end of the afternoon!… That late!… Look, it's lunch time… What do you say I come and treat you both to the restaurant?

Fran: No Maxwell… I really need to discuss things with my mother alone… No one ever teaches you how to become a mother at school, neither how does a pregnancy go!… Punishment mister!

Max: [sighing] All right…'Love you!

Fran: 'Love you too …!

They both hung up.

Max remains alone. He smiles, takes the tape, sighs, and puts it back on his desk.

Brighton comes home towards 5.00 p.m. He comes in the kitchen through the back door, drinks a glass of milk, and then is up to his room. Shortly afterwards, Niles comes in. He spots the empty glass on the counter and prepares to put it in the dish washer when Fran comes in though the banging door.

Niles: Feeling better Mrs. Sheffield?

Fran: Well not really… My headache's not better, I'm starving, but I've been eating all day long and if I don't stop, there will soon be no more competition between Ma and I and Max's going to ditch me!… And, and… Oohh I truly HATE having hormones!!!!!!!!!!

Niles chuckles…

Niles: There, sit down, I'll make you a nice cup of tea…

Fran: Niles, you are a doll… Do you know if Brighton's back?

Niles: He probably is, I found an empty glass of milk on the counter…

Fran stands up at once.

Fran: Very well… Maxwell's in his office?…

Niles: Well I believe so, he gave Miss Babcock her afternoon…

Fran: Fine!…

She exits towards the office.

Maxwell is talking on the phone. The door opens and Fran comes in. Max gestures for her to sit down on the love seat. After a few minutes, he hangs up, stands up and goes to sit next to Fran.

Fran: Okay, I will tell you this once and for all… Maxwell Sheffield, I was your kids' nanny for five years, and we've been married for 8 months, I guess it is way about time for you to trust me fully!

Max: [sigh] I'm sorry Fran, I'm deeply sorry, I should have trust you, I know that… I promise it will never happen again…I don't deserve you…He makes a sad silly face.

Fran can't help but laugh, and gives him a nudge in the ribs.

Fran: Stop talking nonsense you idiot! She teases him.

Max: Am I forgiven?

Fran: How could I not forgive you?… Don't you know I love you so much I can't even be angry with you long enough for you to suffer!

They smile and kiss tenderly.

Max: So… I guess Brighton's home, if you'd just brief me on what you know about this videotape, we could go and talk to him…

Fran: All right… She tells him about what happened in the morning, and Max is not the least happy.

Max: Niles told me he found the tape yesterday evening, and you caught him watching it this morning… He may have watched it in between… All night long!… God I can't believe it!!!… Of course he's 17, a boy, and a little obsessed with girls, but I would never have thought that he'd reach that extend!!!

Fran: Calm down honey… I don't think he's watched it last night because the girls were upstairs and when I came on the landing this morning, it was way too noisy… Besides, he had a lot of homework to do, and that I checked… Now he's almost 18, and if we don't want him to become kinda "addicted" to that kind of things, we'd better talk to him, and make him understand that this is not what love is about…Or as he soon won't need your permission, he may rent these more often, and do… God knows what, and you'll have nothing to say about it…

Max: Mmmm… I suppose you're right… We won't get him to see it was wrong by being mad at him… Okay… Let's go…

They both exit the office, Maxwell taking the tape with him, and they go upstairs to Brighton's room.

They knock at Brighton's door.

Brighton: Yes?

Max and Fran step in. Brighton is sitting on a chair before his desk, obviously doing his homework.

Brighton: Dad… Mom…

Brighton looks like he knows what they are here for… Fran sits on the bed. Maxwell starts to pace back and forth, with his head bent.

Max: Brighton…Fran told me about… this… He shows the videotape.

Brighton looks down.

Max: Did you watch it?

Brighton: Not entirely… But I've watched enough to see some things…

Max: And?…

Brighton: Well… I knew *how it worked* of course… I mean we learn those things in natural sciences classes, but… Well It was much different from what I thought it was in reality… Actually, I couldn't watch it without feeling … uneasy… What the guy was doing…It looked like… I don't know… Some kind of… Well it was not right…

Max: Do you think that's how it is in real life?

Brighton feels really uneasy.

Brighton: Well Dad… I could not help but think that… That well… you and Fran…When you…

Max: Okay, I get the picture… Brighton, you must never, ever think that it is like that in real life. Pornography means anything but love. When two people love one another, it doesn't at all happen like what you saw in this video. It is soft and tender, it is an act of deepest love, of deepest trust … He looks at Fran with a look saying 'sorry', and she nods. I don't want you to think a man has all the rights over a woman or vice versa. It is a mutual agreement, and it has absolutely nothing to do with pornography… And it's never been like that between Fran and myself, neither between Sara and myself, because we LOVE each other and it CANNOT be like that…When the time comes for you, you will discover love is a very special gift the human species has compared to others… And that's all what 'making love' is about…

Brighton: Yes Dad…

Max: Brighton, I'm your father, I'm a man, and I've already been through those 'hormonal crisis' you're living… From now on, I'd be pleased and proud to help you with these matters whenever you have questions about them…

Brighton: Huh… thank you dad but I don't think…

Fran: I don't think your father will give you any moral lessons over this Brighton… And I think it is a good thing actually that you can discuss it with a grown man instead of your friends who are as inexperienced as you are…

Brighton: Well… As a matter of fact, some of them do have an experience in this subject…

Max: I don't think their experience is very relevant Brighton…I don't mean that they don't have indeed a certain experience, but believe your father…It's not love…And that's what's the most important about this… that when you do it, it will be with love, and not only physical needs…

Brighton sighs and thinks for a few seconds.

Brighton: I understand Dad… Now will you please get to the point and tell me what my punishment will be?

Max: There will be no punishment Brighton…I was mad, yes, but thanks to your wonderful mother, I am not anymore… I only want to be sure that you understood what I tried to tell you…That no matter the need you feel, if you don't feel love at the same time, you'd better not do it…

Brighton nodded.

Brighton: Yes Dad…

Max: [handing him the tape] Now I want you to give this tape back to your friend…

Brighton: Yes Dad…And I'll tell him that I don't want to see things like this again…

Max: It is for you to know Brighton… I've told you what I felt was good…

Fran: Okay… We'll leave you think this over Brighton…

They exit Brighton's room.

Fran: Honey?… Didn't you say you wanted to treat me and Ma to the restaurant?

Max: I did…

Fran: Will it bother you if one of us is missing?…I mean I guess Ma have planned something with Pa tonight so I don't think she can join us…

Max smiles broadly.

Max: Ooh what a pity! But… no, it doesn't bother me at all to treat you to the restaurant alone!…

They giggle hugging each other and kissing lightly.

Fran: You know what?

Max: No?

Fran: My headache's gone!

Max: Great!…Now you can't use this excuse tonight after the restaurant… He murmurs into her ear.

Fran: Who said I needed an excuse?…

The End

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