by
Aimee
(aimeed@earthlink.net)
"Come along, Niles! Even Maxwell is keeping up, and he's only six." Nanny Mueller's heavy German accent intruded on Niles' contemplation of a giant puddle and the intense desire to splash about in it in his heavy, uncomfortable boots.
"Seig heil," Niles muttered. He had no idea what it meant, but it sounded rather good.
"Ni-iles," whimpered Max. "My wellies got water in them."
"Mine too. Wait until Nanny has to go to the ladies' room and we'll empty them in her knitting bag." Max nodded and fell back to trot along beside Niles.
Niles held his hand as they climbed the steps of the Museum of Natural History. Max's little legs were too short to take a step all at once as Niles and Nanny did, so he steadied himself with his hand as he climbed the step, then advanced to just below the next step, then climbed again. Step-climb, step-climb. Niles sighed as he felt water dripping down his neck under his coat.
Niles, Max, and Nanny Mueller had been sent to New York for the summer to take in some culture. Nigel and Joc stayed at home in England with their nanny. Niles had been brought along to look after Max, since Max frequently defied Nanny but idolized the two-years-older Niles and emulated him happily.
The thought of a rainy day cooped up in a hotel suite with two mischievous boys was more than even the stoic Nanny Mueller could face. She was in her early twenties, fresh out of Nanny training, and had been hired to look after Maxwell when the other nanny decided that four children -- the three Sheffields and Niles, the butler's son -- was more than she could handle.
At last, the two little boys reached the top of the steps and hurried in out of the rain. Throngs of people were inside. Nanny paid their admission and turned to them, clapping her hands sharply for attention. "Vell! Vat shall ve see to-day?"
"Ancient Egypt," said Niles. "I want to see the mummies."
"I don't like my mummy," said Max. "Yours is nice, though. Why do you want another?"
Nanny Mueller whacked Max's bottom. "Don't ever say you don't like your mummy," she lectured sternly.
"Not that kind of mummy," Niles explained. "A dead body, like in that movie we watched the other night after Nanny went to bed."
Nanny shot him a look but said nothing.
"I didn't like that movie," Max complained.
"Scaredy-cat!" Niles shot back. Max always got his way, and at this rate they'd never see a mummy. "Come on, let's just have a little look, and then we can go look at cavemen and stuff."
Max nodded reluctantly. Accordingly, they filed through a model of a pyramid. A spooky voice guided them through the exhibit via loudspeakers. Max stuck close in the eerie darkness but said nothing. Nanny lectured them on hieroglyphics and burial customs, to which Niles listened with half an ear while keeping his eyes peeled for dead bodies.
"How does Nanny know all this stuff?" Max asked in a stage whisper.
"She was there!" Niles replied.
At last they found the mummy in an airtight glass case at the center of the model pyramid. Niles was thrilled and a little scared as he approached it, Max hanging on him nervously. Nanny had said that they preserved dead bodies so that they remained as they looked in life.
She lied. Niles was sorely disappointed in his mummy. It looked like a person-shaped piece of beef jerky.
Max was tugging on his sleeve. "Come on, Niles. Let's go get our names written in hieroglyphics."
Niles followed him out. They emerged from the pyramid into a huge display on Ancient Egyptian money, commerce, crafts, and politics. Max pulled Niles and Nanny to the line where a museum tour guide waited to write names in hieroglyphics.
Suddenly a sobbing intruded on their ears. "You're mean, Noel! I am not going to marry a mummy." Ahead of them, a pretty blonde girl of about Niles' age was glaring, flushed, at an older blond boy.
"Yes you will, DD. He's going to come alive and kidnap you, and you'll be taken back to his pyramid in Egypt and walled up alive like an ancient princess. He'll make you marry him and them he'll wrap you in bandages and you'll be a mummy, too. And C.C. and I will buy the pyramid and charge people lots of money to look at the mummy's bride when you're all blackened and shriveled like that thing in there."
"Won't," sobbed DD passionately, clearly believing every word. "Won't do it. Don't want to be a horrid old pile of bones and bandages."
A dark-haired woman hurried up to them. "Deirdre Diana Babcock! Cease your howling. Noel, can't you look after her for two minutes? I have to find your sister."
"She's right there, Nanny Bobo. See, looking at the jewelry?"
Niles followed their gaze curiously. He secretly sympathized with this missing sister: who wouldn't want to run away from such a trio? Whiny DD, naughty Noel, and shrill, irritable Nanny Bobo were already getting on Niles' nerves, and he'd never even been properly introduced.
Nanny Bobo started across the room angrily. There, with her little nose pressed against a glass case full of jewelry, was a forlorn-looking blonde girl of about Maxwell's age. Her shoulder-length hair was caught back with a blue satin bow and formed into ringlets. She wore a sailor suit made of a white sweater with a blue collar and a red bow, and a blue pleated skirt with a large, incongruous bow in the back. Her hands and face were pressed longingly against the glass.
"Is it time to go look at the horses?" Niles heard her ask. "Daddy said you'd take us to an exhibit about horses."
"Let your sister and brother finish what they're doing, and then we'll go look at horses. And stop dawdling, C.C. We haven't got time to play."
"Did you see that bear?" Max asked enthusiastically. "Boy, I bet he was mean before he got stuffed. Someday I'm going to kill a big scary bear and stuff it and donate it to a museum."
"Sure you are. Come on, let's go see the dinosaurs. They're even bigger and louder than the bears."
Niles soon regretted selecting dinosaurs. Every display had two buttons in front of it, one to pronounce the dinosaur's name, like "triceratops" or "diplodocus," and one to imitate what it might have sounded like. Everywhere they looked, children, including a rapt Noel and a fussy DD, were pushing buttons over and over. Once again C.C. was nowhere to be seen.
"Niles, what's that noise?" Max asked. "That isn't a dinosaur." He tilted his little dark head.
"Somebody's crying." Niles took Max's hand and they went around the corner.
It was the little blonde, C.C. She sat in a dark corner with her knees drawn up and her face hidden in her folded-up arms.
Max waddled over to her with Niles following more slowly.
"Why are you crying?" Max asked innocently, touching her sweater sleeve. The two boys sat down in front of her, dinosaurs forgotten.
C.C. lifted a tearstained face. "Killed the ponies," she managed. "Huh?" Max and Niles exchanged looks.
"They have a p -- pony like m -- mine, only it's all d -- dead and stuffed."
Max immediately started to cry more out of sympathy for C.C. than distress for the unfortunate ponies. Niles simply watched the girl cry, feeling sorry for her but disgusted by this girlish display. "Did you see the dead cats?" he asked companionably.
"C-cats?" she asked.
"M-hmm. Big soft cuddly kitties like tigers and things." Niles leaned closer to her. "They'll never meow again."
C.C. jumped up, hit him, and ran away.
"You shouldn't tease," Max scolded.
"Just figured that out," replied Niles, rubbing his sore jaw.
They followed her out and found her pressing buttons. "Tyrannosaurus Rex," said the mechanical sounding voice. She pushed the other button and it roared.
"Tyrannosaurus Rex," it said again.
"Hey, it recognizes you," Niles said.
C.C. made it roar again. "Bet you can't make that noise," she challenged.
Niles growled.
C.C. kicked him where he'd never been kicked before.
He roared.
"That's better," she said with a contented smile.
"He's turning blue," Max said worriedly.
"Be careful," Niles moaned. "She only looks harmless."
Pleased with this tribute, C.C. put her tongue out at him and permitted him to pull her hair without repercussion.
Emboldened, he reached out to pull it again. Even Max reached out to tug her yellow curls, sensing that this was one of those rare girls who appreciated that hair pulling was a gesture of affection. But just as C.C. was balling up her little fists ready to return the love, a nasal whine interrupted them.
"Val, I don't wanna see the dinosaurs. Nay says there's naked cavemen in the evolution exhibit. I wanna see a naked caveman."
"Try playin' doctor with Danny Imperiali."
"I did."
"Fran, why don't they ever do an exhibit on the history of make-up or something that actually matters?"
"It's a museum, Val. It's about educational stuff. It ain't supposed to be about stuff that matters."
The two girls whose debate interrupted C.C., Niles, and Max were like no one else they'd ever seen. Val had frizzy blonde hair and wore jeans and a hot pink and orange striped sweater. Fran had long curly dark hair and appeared to be dressed as a gypsy dancer, complete with bracelets and a bright beaded rainbow sweater. Both were about C.C.'s age.
Max began tugging on Niles' arm. "You said we could see cavemen," he accused. "Let's go with that girl and see the cavemen."
Fran heard him. She held out her hand. "Come on," she encouraged.
Niles ran and fetched Nanny Mueller while Fran fetched a huge, terrifying woman with blonde hair bigger than Niles' whole body. C.C. looked around for her nanny, and saw her on the other side of the room. "Wait!" she said to them, and ran. "Noel! Nanny! Can we go see a caveman? There are these boys, and they're going to see a caveman with that girl, and I wanna go!"
"Where are they?" Nanny asked.
C.C. turned around to point and found them gone.
She sat down on the floor and whimpered in frustration.
"Chastity Claire, stand up, you'll get your dress dirty," Nanny Bobo ordered, pulling C.C. to her feet and brushing her off.
While she was being fussed over, dress dusted and hair straightened, C.C. looked forlornly toward the Tyrannosaurus Rex from which her new friends had disappeared.
C.C. thrust out her chin. "I didn't want to see the caveman anyhow," she said, pouting.
"Tag!" Fran shouted, touching Max's arm. He toddled after her, a determined scowl on his face. Fran ran into a model cave and Max hovered outside, unsure about the darkness within but sure she must come out eventually.
Nanny Mueller and Sylvia, Fran's mother (not the nanny, to the boys' astonishment) were quarrelling.
"My boys, they will be so very sick from dat candy you gave them!" Nanny Mueller howled.
"Chocolate is a vegetable! It grows on a plant! Don't they teach nutrition in England?" Sylvia trumpeted.
Niles shook his head and grinned, thinking that perhaps he liked the big-haired lady after all.
Just as he was about to hide behind a wooly mammoth, he saw C.C. and her family walk sedately by the door. "C.C.! C.C.!" he shouted. "Come play tag."
C.C.'s small, solemn face brightened at the sound of his voice. She tugged on Bobo's hand and looked all around, trying to find the source. "Niles, Max," she said insistently.
"C.C., we don't have time for your imaginary friends." Nanny Bobo pulled her away.
Just then, Niles appeared in the hall. "Niles!" C.C. cried, breaking free and hurrying to him.
"Come on, we're playing tag." C.C. took his hand and ran into the cave, where Max was floundering about in the dark trying to tag Fran and Val.
Instead, he caught C.C. by the sleeve. "Tag," he crowed.
C.C. chased them all out of the cave and around the wooly mammoth.
Unused to being permitted to run, C.C. found herself unsuccessful. Even Max easily outran her. She stopped, frowning. Suddenly, she shouted, "Fran! Val! I found the naked caveman!"
Fran was too clever, but Val was immediately at C.C.'s side. "Where?"
"Tag!" C.C. hit Val's arm and ran away.
"Chastity Claire Babcock!"
Nanny Bobo! C.C. skidded to a halt and fell flat on her face. She began to cry piteously.
Noel was beside her immediately. "There, don't cry sis, here, let me." Noel pulled out a hanky and gently dabbed blood from her chin.
C.C. struggled free of his embrace and got up. "They'll tag me," she said fretfully. "I don't like to be 'it.'"
Nanny was beside her in an instant. "Don't you see what happens when you play rough, C.C.? Come on, little one, let's go home and get you patched up. We mustn't let your cut scar or your pretty face will be all spoiled."
"She's already spoiled," Noel contributed, ever the supportive sibling.
"Can I say good-bye?" C.C. asked hopefully.
"Bye, C.C." It was Niles. Shyly, he dashed forward and pecked her cheek with his lips. "You're okay for a girl."
C.C. kissed him back. "You're okay, too. I mean, you're kind of a jerk, but I like you that way."
"Bye, C.C." Little Max solemnly held out his hand, taking no chances on acquiring any girl germs through kisses. C.C. shook it solemnly.
"You must come for tea some time," she said formally.
Nanny Bobo took C.C.'s hand and led her away. C.C. looked back over her shoulder as long as she could. She looked so sad, even the bows on her dress seemed to be drooping. "Come along, C.C.," they could hear Noel say. "Be a good girl and I'll buy you a toy pony in the gift shop."
Niles found playing tag with three six year olds boring and discouraging. It was just too easy and it wasn't fair to them that he was older and bigger. So eventually he sat to the side, obediently holding a skein of yarn while Nanny wound it.
Max eventually came to sit by him, and asked, "What's wrong, Niles?"
Niles sighed. "Do you think C.C. would come to England and visit? I want to show her our tree fort."
Outraged, Max gaped at him. "You're going to share the tree fort with a girl?"
"Sure, C.C.'s okay. She's kinda tough, even if she does cry a lot."
"And pretty," Max said shrewdly.
Niles pouted. "I didn't notice."
"But not as pretty as Fran," Max added. "If we share with C.C., we have to share with Fran." Niles merely nodded, not knowing why he felt so down.
That first touch of amore, naively centered around a game of tag and a tree fort, soon passed, and the two little boys returned to England not knowing that when it came to their new friends from the museum, the game of tag had only just begun.
The End
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