Disclaimer: "The Nanny" and all characters are owned by Fran Drescher, Sony Pictures, Tri-Star Columbia Pictures, High School Sweethearts, Sternim and Fraiser, Inc., etc.... This is for fun only, no infringements are meant.
To Nanny fans: This is story number 7, can you believe it? As always this follows my previous ones and like "How Hard Could It Be?", it focuses on Fran's pregnancy. So, please sit back and enjoy it–laugh and smile until you can no more!! Let me know what you think.
by
Caryn
(drescher_fine@yahoo.com)
"Breathe in, breathe out. Breathe in, breathe out."
"Darling, are you going to do this or not?" Max is sitting on the floor with Fran. She’s lying against a pillow between his legs with her arms wrapped around his knees as his hands are gently rubbing her protruding belly.
"Max, if she tells me how to breathe one more time, I’m gonna give her my own lesson after I rip her head off."
"Fran, she’s only trying to help us prepare for the births."
"Us? What us? You’re not gonna push two babies out. I am."
"Yes, us. Who else in going to be in that room, letting you squeeze the hell out of his hand, other then me? Now, will you just listen to the instructor, so I don’t have to hear you later, yelling at me for not making you listen in the first place." Max smiles at Fran, but he knows he’s in the doghouse on this one.
"Max, are you ever sympathetic to me? Why do you always have to be so damn logical all the time?"
"Logical? What logic? I married you! What kind of logic was that?" He laughs as Fran pouts and smacks his arm playfully. "Would you just breathe."
"Max, don’t tell me to breathe. I’ll breathe when I want to, got it! Besides, this is gonna hurt, no amount of breathing is gonna help me. So lay off!"
"Fine." Max sighs, but starts again, "Fran?"
"What?"
"Breathe in, breathe out.." He softly whispers in her hair. Max can’t help himself, he loves teasing Fran.
"Are you enjoying this?" Fran asks him as she squeezes his leg. "Let me tell you this, Mister. When, this birth really happens, you are so gonna wish, that you were nicer to me. You know I control when we make love after these two are born. It all depends on me. Do you realize that, Max?"
"Yeah, okay Fran. Like you could hold off that long. If you’re going to threaten me with something, choose something that you can really stop doing." He smiles as she turns to face him.
"This is so annoying."
"What is?"
"You knowing me too well. How is it, that you always know what buttons to push in me, huh?"
"The benefits of being your husband. Which I may add, is finding to be a very well suited job for me."
"You just love reaping the benefits, don’t ya?"
"That’s why we’re here!" Max smiles proudly at Fran’s ‘condition’.
"Yeah, this is all your fault." Fran points to her belly and giggles as Max kisses her fingers.
"Okay, I can take the blame. Although, I do believe you were there too, and as I recall, you were a very willing participate and quite enjoying it."
"As always." Fran smirks, thinking of her life with Max.
Max looks up from their private conversation and sees the instructor’s glare.
"Fran, we really should practice."
"What practice? When this happens, I’m gonna scream like hell, break your hand and beg the doctors for an epideral. Tell me--when am I gonna have time to breathe?" She smiles sweetly at him. Her hormones definitely get the better of her.
Max is quiet for a moment and then he softly whispers, "By the way, I love you."
Fran is about to respond to him, but the Lamaze instructor makes an announcement.
"Alright, Mommies. You’re doing great, keep it up. Meanwhile, Mrs. Sheffield, were you planning on joining the group in any one of the practices?"
"Well, Trish. This is all so fascinating, but I don’t think I need a non-pregnant woman, telling me how easy birth is and..."
In one quick move, Max covers Fran’s mouth with his hand. Fran continues talking but the words are inaudible. Max just smiles as the instructor folds her arms across her chest, just staring at them.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"What?" Fran asks as they enter the townhouse after Lamaze class.
"Nothing. I just never knew anyone could get kicked out of that kind of class."
"Max, she was so annoying. She doesn’t know how it feels to have two forty pound matzoh balls being yanked out of your nostrils. Besides, Honey, I was twice the size as the rest of the mothers in that room."
"Fran, you’re having twins."
"Fran, you’re not twice the size, would have been the better way to go." She informs her husband.
Max rolls his eyes, he can’t win with her.
"Honey, we need to talk about names. We only have two weeks until these two make their way out. We need to agree on them. So, let’s start over and take this seriously."
"Seriously? Fran, you want to call our son, Shlomo. What do you want to call our daughter, Shloma?"
"I wasn’t gonna tell you, but since you guessed....."
"Fran!"
"Wha?" Fran gives Max that certain smile of her’s.
Max rubs his temples, he’s getting that throbbing headache, he calls "Fran" again.
"Max, if I remember, the night of our wedding you said you wouldn’t mind making Shlomo for Brighton. How was I supposed to know that you didn’t want to name him that after we got pregnant?" Fran has Maxwell there and he knows it.
"Fran, that’s just unbelievable how you can remember everything when it suits you. Why don’t we buy a baby book and go through it together." Max makes an attempt to compromise.
"Fine, I can do that." Fran agrees and then quietly mumbles under her breath, "Not that my mind will change."
"What Darling?"
Fran looks at Max and smiles, changing the subject, "Why don’t we go shopping?"
"Fran–no!. I am not carrying you again through the mall. The last time your back hurt too much to continue."
"But, Max!"
"Fran, what if you go into labor?"
"Well, that’s not going to happen. But if it did, you’d be there with me. So what if our babies were born in Loehman’s?"
"Fran!"
"Fine," Mumbling to herself again, "I’ll have Ma take me."
"I heard that! I’ve already called your mother and she’s agreed not to take you even if you begged her."
"Max, she’d never listen to you, I’m her daughter."
"That’s true, Fran. But, I’m the man who married her daughter, which seems to hold well over your mother’s head." Max laughs as Fran pouts. "That and I bribed her."
"What makes you think that I can’t over bribe you?"
"Three words: Food, Grandchildren and Broadway tickets."
"Max, that’s five words and that’s not fair! What else am I suppose to offer her?"
"Nothing. That’s the point." Max smiles at Fran, making her even more upset that he has gotten away with it.
He walks over to Fran, dipping her slightly into a very passionate kiss. After a few, moments, he lifts her back up and stands there holding her.
"Honey, don’t think that kissing me like that will change the fact that you conspired with my own mother. How could ya?"
"Darling, stop being so dramatic. Didn’t you expect I go Yiddish eventually after living with you for so long? You do rub off on me. In fact just yesterday, Niles told me how Fran I was becoming." He smiles sweetly at her.
"Then my work is done." She laughs as Max grabs her hand guiding her to the couch.
"Fran I have some errands to do. Now, I want you to sit here and relax. If I find out you went out shopping, I’ll give you hell when I get home."
"Max....." Fran starts off sweetly giving her best innocent face.
"Fran, I said No!"
"I just love it when you order me around. What a turn on!"
"Fran, be good."
"Trust me, Babe."
"Famous last words." He mumbles to himself, walking towards the front door.
"Huh?"
"Nothing, Sweetheart. I have both my pager and cell phone if you need me for anything."
"Don’t worry about me. I’ll just sit here like a good wife."
"Fran, guilt doesn’t work on me. I’m British."
"Blah, blah, blah." Fran rolls her eyes in annoyance.
Max walks back over and kisses her lightly on the lips, "Okay, I’m trusting you. By the way, I’ll know if you get Val or Niles to take you. I have all the bases covered."
"Maxwell Sheffield! I can’t believe you! Don’t ya have any faith in your wife?" Fran fakes a hurt look and crosses her arms.
"This question coming from the woman who conspired behind her employer’s back when she was employed as his nanny."
"Wrong. It wasn’t behind your back. I did it right in front of you. Not my fault you couldn’t keep up with me."
"Oy!" Max states as he shakes his head. "I’ll be back in a little while. I love you."
"I love you too." He bends down once again and kisses her.
As Max walks out the front door, Brighton comes flying through the livingroom on his way up to his room. He slows down enough he say hi to her, but Fran suddenly has an idea.
‘Meanwhile, he never said Brighton couldn’t take me.’ Muttering to herself as she slowly rises from the couch.
"Oh, B, whatcha doing?" Fran asks quickly before he can make it up the stairs.
"Nothing, just going up to chat on-line with a few friends. Why?" He stops on the first step and walks back to the couch.
"Well, how would you like to do me a favor?"
"Depends. You’re not making me schlep to five different stores because you have a craving for a schnitzel, ice cream, M&M’s and licorice again, are you? Oh, wait I forgot the cheese cake."
"B. That only happened once. You’re never gonna drop it are you?"
"Once was enough. I ended up in Jersey!"
Fran changes the subject back, "Meanwhile, I was wondering if you wouldn’t mind taking me to the mall real quick."
"Quick? Fran, when’s the last time you were in the mall under five hours?"
"Last week, after your father came in and dragged me out." She laughs thinking about it, "He realized his Gold card was in the hands of his pregnant wife."
"Okay. Let’s go, but under one condition. If I talk to any cute girls, don’t act like my mother."
"Fine." Grabbing her purse as they head out the door, Fran continues, "I’ll just stand there and act invisible. Don’t worry about me." She gives him a face that any moment could break into tears as she’s rubbing her belly making Brighton feel extremely guilty.
"I’m sorry, Fran. I didn’t mean it. I want you to embarrass me."
Fran smiles. ‘Guilt, lt works every time, if only I could get it to work on Max.’
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Max is heading towards the Palisades Mall to do a little shopping himself. That’s one of the reasons he doesn’t want Fran to go. He’d like to buy her some special things as well as the twins.
He wants to surprise Fran, which is something that doesn’t happen to often with her around. He parks the Jaguar and walks into the mall feeling great and can’t wait to see Fran’s face when he gets home.
Max enters Carters, the baby store of fashionable babies. He walks through the store wondering what to buy for his son and daughter. He strolls by the newborn clothes and stops instantly as he sees the most adorable outfit for his little girl. Max laughs out loud as he realizes he’s really turning into his wife.
The outfit is a leopard print jumper with a matching headband. His smile spreads quickly across his face thinking how much Fran would love this. He has to admit that he even likes it too, although he’s always giving Fran a hard time about that kind of print. He grabs it off the rack and goes to pay for it.
~~~~~~~~~~~
Fran enters Carters with Brighton. They head to the newborn clothes as well. Fran is right behind Max and doesn’t know it. It’s a good thing they don’t see each other or hell would break loose. Brighton heads straight for the newborn boy’s clothes.
"Look Fran. It’s a navy blue jacket with that nautical sign that Dad loves so much. Remember he always made me wear one and how he had his own. Let’s get one."
"B, you hated it. What makes you think that your brother is gonna like it?"
"I just think he will. Besides, can you image Dad’s face if he knew you bought that instead of an animal print outfit."
"Yeah, he is always yelling at me for wearing those, isn’t he?" She looks down at her current outfit, a snow-leopard print maternity dress. "Meanwhile, he’s never complained about that neglige I wear."
"Oh, TOO MUCH INFORMATION, about my parents!" Brighton’s look makes Fran laugh.
"Okay, B. Grab one and let’s see what else we can find."
They walk around almost bumping into Max, but just miss him as he heads back out into the mall.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Max enters Babies’R’Us looking in awe at everything one can buy for babies these days. He doesn’t remember buying anything for Margaret, Brighton or Grace. Niles went out and did that, he was too busy. Now, he can do it himself.
Suddenly comprising an idea, Max snaps his fingers. Why doesn’t he buy everything Fran and him need for the babies’ room. Better yet, why doesn’t he get the kids to help him decorate it for Fran.
He hears a woman laugh and not paying attention, he trips over a crib. Max turns suddenly around knowing exactly who that laugh belongs to. No one other than Fran can laugh like that, and he forbid her to go shopping. He looks by the entrance for Fran but doesn’t see her.
~~~~~~~~~~~
Meanwhile, Brighton and Fran walk into Babies’R’Us, laughing at each other and having a great mother and son time. Brighton doesn’t really mind being seen with his mother in public.
Just as they enter the store, they see a man trip over a crib and they laugh watching him try to get up. They disappear before they see his face and continue shopping. Fran, about to comment of how much that guy looks like Max from the back, stops, ‘Nah, he would never step foot in the mall unless I dragged him in.’ Deep down, Fran has a sudden feeling about something, but doesn’t know what it is. Not yet anyhow.
"B, I should check in on your father. I need to see when he’s planning on being home, so I know what time I have to get my tuchaus right back on that couch. Did I mention he forbid me to go shopping?"
"Fran! You mean if we get caught, I’m dead. Oy, why I listen to you."
"Because I’m your mother."
"Like that makes me feel better." He retorts back, smiling innocently at her.
Fran smacks his arm and picks up her cell phone to call Maxwell. She dials the number. As she’s waiting for an answer, someone’s cell phone in the store begins ringing.
"Can you believe the nerve of some people these days. To use their cell phones in public. Listen to it. Oy."
Brighton rolls his eyes and points to Fran’s own phone. Fran looks at him and smiles.
"Oh." She gives her famous smile everyone knows, just like she’s been caught in something.
~~~~~~~~~~
Max is trying to balance all the baby stuff he is intending to buy in both hands. Just as he has it perfect and is sure nothing is going to fall, his cell phone rings. It startles him and he loses all concentration. Everything falls. He sighs and answers his phone.
~~~~~~~~~~
"Where is your father? Gesh, and why isn’t that person answering the phone?" Fran looks around trying to see whose phone it is, but can’t see anyone, unless it’s that guy’s over there, who just dropped his stuff all over the ground.
"Finally!" Fran states as that annoying phone’s ringing stops, not to mention her husband picks up at the same time. ‘Hmmm....I wonder what that’s about?’ She shakes her head and turns her attention back towards Max who is already talking.
"Finally, what? I couldn’t get to the phone."
"I didn’t mean you, Honey. I was talking about, oh never mind. Hi Max, I miss ya." Fran manages to spit out after some difficulty.
"Hello, Darling. I miss you too. What do you want Fran?"
"Nothing. I just want to know when you’ll be home. Sooo... when do you think you’ll be home?"
Brighton tries not to laugh, but he can’t help it. Laughter erupts uncontrollably out of him. Fran tries to smack his arm again, but he backs up fast enough to get out of his mother’s reach. Fran glares at him.
"What’s Brighton up to?"
"Nothing. Just being a pain as usual. He was just saying how much he liked you last play and would love to take Leire to it. You know that cute foreign exchange student from Spain he’s always drooling and talking about. I think that is a great idea, don’t you Sweetie?"
Fran smiles sweetly at Brighton. She’ll get him back and how much better than to make her son suffer through Max’s ‘Revival of Love Story’ once more.
"Yes it is. I’m glad he liked the play. Tell him I’ll arrange everything. Meanwhile, I’ll be home soon."
"Define ‘soon’ Honey"
"Why Fran? Is there some reason that you don’t want me to come home now?"
"No. I just wanted to be properly dressed, if you get my drift, when you get home." She changes her voice to a seductive whisper.
"Fran, what am I going to do with you?"
"Well, Maxwell Sheffield, if you have to ask that question, then we have a problem."
"The problem is my wife is the biggest drama queen I know. So Francine, do you think you could give me another hour or so?"
"I’ll try, but it will be difficult. Okay Honey. I love you."
"I love you too, Darling. See you soon."
"Yeah."
Fran closes her cell phone, looking for Brighton. He standing behind her with his hands over his ears.
"B, whatcha doin’?"
"Yet again, TOO MUCH INFORMATION about my parents. I wonder if Gracie is taking new patients?" He laughs and Fran joins in.
"By the way, your father is making arrangements for you to see the ‘Revival of Love Story’ again."
"But, Fran. Wasn’t once enough? I don’t deserve to be that lucky." Sarcasm lacing Brighton’s voice, as he tries talking Fran out of it.
"Oh, yes you do deserve to be that lucky. Its your own fault." They both chuckle again as they walk down another isle.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Max places his phone back into his jacket pocket, shaking his head, ‘Funny, how close Fran sounded. It’s like I could reach out and touch her.’ Max forgets about his own comment as he bends back down to pick up all the boxes he dropped.
He secures it all once again in his arms and heads up to the register to pay, including the two cribs, the changing table, the play pin and a few more items already waiting.
He smiles thinking of how surprised Fran is going to be when she sees all of this. His next step is to confide in the children and get their help in decorating the babies’ room, which shouldn’t be a problem.
"Will that be cash or charge?" The clerk asks him and Max just laughs. The clerk looks at him strangely.
"I’m sorry. It’s just that’s my wife’s favorite saying. You’d have to know her." Max tries explaining, but the clerk is still starting at him, so Max stops and answers, "Charge." He looks in his wallet and can’t find his American Express Gold Card. "Make that cash. It seems my card is missing again." Max says with a little irritation, making the clerk laugh.
"Your wife?"
"As always." Max comments as he hands the money to the man. "Can this be delivered later today?"
"Sure. That’s not a problem."
"Good, here’s the address." Max hands his business card to him.
"You’re Maxwell Sheffield, the Broadway Producer?"
"That’s right."
"I’m Kent. I was in your Revival of Brigadoon, that’s where I meet my boyfriend. He was in the chorus and I was the understudy of the understudy of the understudy."
"I see. That’s nice, thanks for sharing." Max tries holding back his laughter and attempts to smile instead. "I hope the both of you are happy."
Max quickly starts to the entrance back into the mall, remembering a similar conversation with a guy at the Kindervelt Reunion him and Fran went to a few years ago. He shakes his head, ‘It must be musical theater.’
He stops and takes his cell phone out to call Fran to see if she needs anything before he heads home.
"Sheffield Residence." Comes Niles’ voice on the other end of the phone.
"Niles, Is Fran around?"
Niles rolls his eyes. He prepares the excuse Fran came up with just in case Max called and she was still out.
"Sir, she’s upstairs in your room napping."
"Okay, Niles. Don’t wake her, I’m glad she’s sleeping. I’m on my way home, but several packages will be arriving at the house. Don’t let Fran see them. Can you put them in the babies’ room?"
"Yes, sir. You went shopping, didn’t you?" Niles smiles brightly, thinking of his boss finally becoming the father he always should have been.
"Yes, Niles, I did. And I had fun. I can’t wait to see Fran?"
"Oh, by my calculations, you should have bumped into each other by now." Niles mumbles under his breath.
"What was that, Ol’ Man?"
"Nothing Sir. I’ll take care of everything." Niles places the phone back on the cradle, thinking to himself, ‘Fran you sure have changed our boy, haven’t you? What your love has done.’
~~~~~~~~~
Niles picks up the phone once again dialing Fran’s cell phone.
"Hello." Fran says in an out of breath tone.
"Mrs. Sheffield, you’re not overdoing it, are you?"
"Oh, Niles. No, but B here won’t stop making me laugh. Whatcha want?"
"You better get yourself home."
"Why is my hubby there?" She laughs while following Brighton up to the register.
"Not yet. He just called and he’s on his way."
"Oopsie. I guess I need to get home too, huh? Thanks Niles. I owe you big time." Fran closes her phone and turns to find Brighton piling up all the stuff they picked out for the twins’ room. "B, we need to get going. You’re father is on his way home and I need to beat him there."
"Well, we’re all set. I’m assuming you have Dad’s Gold card?"
"Yep, but now it’s his and mine."
"Fran, it’s always been your’s." He laughs and she smiles innocently at him.
~~~~~~~~~~
While walking out of the store, Max swears he hears Fran’s laugh again. That certain tone of hers can always grab his attention. This time when he turns, he sees Fran out of the corner of his eye.
"I knew it, I knew it was her. I should have known that it was too easy when I left. What am I going to do with her?" He smiles and then roll his eyes. He sees Brighton and shakes his head. "Even my son is a traitor."
Max looks around, seeing a small stuffed puppy, he picks it up. He sneaks back into the store and stops behind Brighton, but hidden enough so Fran can’t see him. He throws the stuffed animal, hitting Brighton in the back of the head. Max then proceeds to venture home.
~~~~~~~~~~
Brighton rubs his head and turns around. A three year old little girl looks at him and laughs. He wonders what just happened as he bends over to pick up a little stuffed puppy. He returns his attention back towards Fran and the clerk, who at the moment are laughing.
Fran hands the credit card to the clerk who stares at the name, "So, you’re Mrs. Sheffield." He says with a knowing smile, remembering his conversation with Mr. Sheffield just a little while ago.
"Yes...I...am." She proudly replies, showing off her big tummy.
"You do know your husband was here already, don’t you?"
"Honey, my husband would never step foot into the mall unless I dragged him here under false pretenses. Ya got to know him."
"Funny, that’s what he said about you." The clerk mutters under his breath.
"Can I get this..."
"Delivered?" The clerk finishes her question, figuring she must be just like her husband. "Yes, we can have it there today."
"Well, actually can you have it delivered tomorrow afternoon. I’m not supposed to be shopping and my husband will be home tonight." She smiles at the clerk, trying back to Brighton.
"B, let’s go! You’re father will kill us both if he finds out."
They are almost to the exit of the mall when suddenly Fran stops, dropping the bag with the baby clothes in it. Her face contorts into a pained expression as she holds her stomach.
"Fran, what’s wrong?" Brighton asks her with noticeable worry in his voice.
"Nothing. I just had a sharp pain. I’m okay."
"What do you mean ‘a sharp pain’?" Brighton starts freaking out, "You’re not in labor are you?"
"No. See its all gone. I probably just overdid it today."
"Hence why Dad forbid you to go shopping!"
"B, let’s not go there unless we have to, and Sweetie, we don’t have to!" She goes to grab the bag, but Brighton picks it up and places his arm around her.
"C’mon Mom. Let’s go home." He guides her out towards the town car, both sighing in relief.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Max walks in the back door. He’s not sure if Fran is back yet, and starts heading into the livingroom until Niles walks in.
"Sir, you’re home. How wonderful."
"Niles, I know Fran went out. You can stop covering for her."
"Sir, whatever do you mean?"
"Niles, stop it. Would you just admit it for once."
"Not on your life."
~~~~~~~~~
Fran and Brighton walk in the front door and hear Max’s voice coming closer and closer into the livingroom.
Fran grabs her stomach with both hands and hot tails herself to the couch. She sits down just as Max enters the livingroom, who is trying to suppress a laugh. Brighton sees the bag from Carters by Fran’s feet and nonchalantly walks over and grabs it, making a b-line for the stairs.
"Hey Brighton." Max calls to his son, stopping the boy on the first step.
"Yeah, Dad?" Brighton replies, shoving the bag up his shirt.
"Have you been hit in the head by, oh let’s say, a stuffed puppy lately?" He quietly asks, so Fran can’t hear.
Brighton stares at his father and smiles, "No, why? Throw any lately?"
"Maybe." Brighton looks at him not understanding, so Max continues, "I’ll explain later." He smiles back at Brighton and goes to sit by Fran.
"So, Darling what did you do while I was out?" Max sweetly asks as he places his arm around her shoulders.
"Nothing. I was so bored without you." Fran gives Max one of her pitiful looks which makes Max roll his eyes.
"You were, huh? Well, didn’t Brighton keep you company?" Fran snaps her head to look at Max, wondering if he knew. Max smiles waiting for Fran to admit she went shopping. Neither of them give in.
"Yes, but it’s not the same as it is with you." She answers back trying to convince him, "I can’t enjoy spending mone.....my day without you here by my side." She gives him one of her best smiles, hoping he didn’t notice her slip.
Max already knowing, smiles back at Fran and pulls her closer to himself.
"How are you feeling?"
"Why, what do ya have in mind?"
"Fran, I would love to do that." He blushes a little and continues, "I was talking about dinner. How would you like to have some time alone with your husband for a romantic dinner?"
"Max, that’s so sweet. Besides, I have this feeling it’s gonna be the last time we get a chance for awhile. These two will keep us busy, oh say for the next eighteen years." Fran pauses and then continues, "Honey, what do you think our babies will be like?"
"Well, our daughter will be a perfect copy of her mother, with her beautiful nose, her enchanting eyes and most gorgeous face God ever put on this earth. She’ll be full of fire and pizzazz, and she’ll turn heads where ever she goes. Although thinking of the latter, we’ll have to lock her up in her room."
"Great, she’ll never get married."
"Did I just hear your mother’s words coming out of your mouth?"
"Oy, you so don’t want to go there."
"Why, Fran? Are you afraid to play with the big dog?"
"Not at all, in fact, playing with him is my favorite activity. And big would definitely describe him well." She winks at Max as he hugs her. Fran pulls back and continues, "And speaking of activities, if someone here would have admitted how he felt and stop taking it back, we could have been playing a long time ago."
"Fran, would you stop bringing that up?"
"Why? Does it make you feel bad and guilty?"
"Yes."
"Well, that’s why I have to bring it up."
Fran suddenly stops laughing and rubs her belly. She shifts her position, but soon a slight pain shoots through her back and into her stomach. Max notices her pained expression.
"Darling are you alright?"
"Yeah, I think our babies got a little overexcited about the word dinner and they let their mommy know."
"Are you sure you’re up to it?"
"I’m fine as long as you don’t let go of me and hold me like this for the rest of our lives." Max leans over and kisses Fran passionately on the lips, pulling her onto his lap.
"No way I’d ever let go of you. Fran, are you sure you’re okay to go out?"
"Max, you have two very hungry babies not to mention a famished wife, of course we’re going."
"So does this mean you’re not mad at me, for not taking you shopping?"
"Sweetie, of course I’m not mad," Under her breath, she adds, "although you may be mad at me after you get the bill."
"What Darling?".
"Max, have I told you lately how much I love you?" Fran quickly changes the subject.
"And I love you too. Why don’t you go up and take a nap. I know Niles said you already had one," Max continues playing Fran’s game, "but you still look tired. I’ll wake you and then we’ll get ready."
She starts to argue, "I’m not really that tired."
"Fran! Go lay down!"
"Another order. I love it when you do that." She winks at him as he helps her to her feet, guiding her up the stairs to their room.
He helps her lay down on her side. He grabs her body pillow so her belly can rest on it, making it easier for her to sleep. Max kisses her cheek and strokes her back before leaving her to rest.
He proceeds to Brighton’s room. Max looks in, seeing Brighton using his computer.
"Brighton, what are you doing?"
"Oh just talking to a couple of girls from around the world. See, this one is Steffi, she’s from Germany."
"Brighton, what happened to that girl you wanted to take to the play?"
"Leire? Dad, there’s no reason I can’t talk to two girls at the same time. I’m not involved with either of them, so there’s no problem."
"Oy, don’t let Fran ever hear you say that. She’d kill me for passing my non-committal genes on to you."
"Speaking of Fran. Dad, how did you know that we were at the mall?"
"Let’s go find your sisters and I’ll explain everything to you."
They head down to the kitchen and find Gracie and Maggie talking over a pint of Hagan Daaz. Max and Brighton grab two more spoons and join them.
"What are all your plans for tonight?"
"Nothing really. Julia and Stacy canceled on me." Maggie answers cautiously, wondering why her father is asking.
"What about you Grace?"
"I’m free." She says enthusiastically.
"Well, I went shopping today and bought a lot of things for the babies’ room. I was thinking that you three...."
"Oh, can we? Daddy, can we decorate it for Fran?" Grace jumps in excitedly.
"That’s what I was about to ask. Would you three mind? I’m taking her out to dinner so it will be a surprise. I’m sure Niles will help too."
"So, Dad that’s how you saw us today. This really will surprise her. I’m proud of you. We really have become a family, haven’t we?"
Niles walks into the kitchen and smiles. Has this family come along way or what?
"Oh, Niles. Did the packages from Babies’R’Us arrive yet?" Max questions, hoping they are here.
"Yes, Sir. All packages are upstairs in the room as we speak. And may I add, how wonderful I think this is. Mrs. Sheffield will be absolutely shocked when she finds out what her British uptight husband did for her."
"Niles!" Max states but quickly calms down, realizing Niles is right. "Okay so maybe I am uptight."
"Nah...not you." Maggie harasses her father but he ignores her comment.
"Okay, children let’s go. Fran and I are not going out for a little while yet, so I can help too." Max gets up from the kitchen table, walking back up the stairs behind them, not being able to contain his pride.
They all pile into the twins’ room and look around. It’s empty with the exception of the new packages Max bought.
"Ah, Dad. There’s something I need to tell you." Brighton says after examining the boxes carefully.
"What is it Brighton."
"Well, we kind of, sort of, already bought this stuff today. In fact, you two picked out exactly the same things, design and all. This is scary, now they think alike." Brighton, Grace and Maggie all laugh as Max just stares at them.
"That’s okay. I’ll have the other returned and for the first time since Fran has stepped foot in this house, I’ll have a credit on that card." He laughs at his own joke and goes over to start assembling the cribs.
Brighton walks over to his father, "Dad, I think we can do this together, what do you think?"
"I think that would be great!" Max beams at his son, quietly thanking Fran for her wonderful influence that she bestowed on Brighton, making him a caring and loving young man.
They pull all of the parts of the soon-to-be crib out, of course leaving the directions in the box, since reading them isn’t a manly thing to do.
Gracie leans over to Maggie and whispers, "I have this feeling they are gonna wish they read those instructions." Both girls giggle as the two men glare at them.
An hour and two cribs later, Brighton and Max take a break and survey their handy work. They both smile at their accomplishment.
"Gracie, come here. Dad and B put up both cribs." Maggie yells to her sister who is putting up the border along the walls.
"No way!" Gracie turns around disbelieving in what she sees. "Wait–how many extra parts did they hide?"
"Can’t you two just admit we did a good job?" Brighton questions his sisters.
"No." Maggie and Grace state in unison, turning to look at each other.
"I have an idea." Maggie walks out of the room and returns a minute later with one of Grace’s dolls. Holding up the doll, Maggie continues, "This will prove if our sister and brother are safe in these things."
She gently places the doll in one of the cribs and it looks hopeful. The crib is still standing. Max clasps Brighton on the back.
"Well, my dear daughters, it looks like Brighton and myself do know a little about mechanical procedures. Brighton we did it!"
Just as Max finishes his statement, both cribs fall down into pieces.
"Brighton, what was that idea of not having to use all the screws that comes in the box? Have any more bright ideas?"
Maggie and Grace roll on the floor with laughter as Max and Brighton’s faces fall.
Grace finds the instructions and hands them to Brighton, "Here ya want to try again?"
"Shup up, Gracie."
Next thing they hear is Fran’s distinctive voice coming out from the hall. Since the twins’ room is next to her and Max’s room, all four of them instantly quiet down. They mentally find places to hide just in case Fran walks in, which they all know is highly unlikely. As far as Fran knows, this room is empty.
Niles is just walking up the front stairs and sees Fran in the hall. He once again saves the day.
"Mrs. Sheffield, what are you doing up? I thought you were sleeping."
"Yeah, according to you, I’ve been sleeping all day. I’m not tired, but I am hungry. Where’s Max? And where’s the kids?"
"Oh, I do believe they’re all down in the kitchen."
"Oh, the kitchen, I could go for some food. C’mon Niles, let’s go make me something to eat."
"Fran, you’re going out soon. Why do you want food now?"
"Niles, don’t ever ask a pregnant woman that question. She cannot be held responsible for her actions." She smirks in Niles’ direction heading for the stairs.
"YES, LET’S GO LOOK FOR THE FAMILY!" Niles shouts for Max to hear him, trying to give him a head start. Fran these days can take forever and a day going down the stairs, especially eight and half months pregnant.
"Gesh, Niles. You don’t have to shout. I’m pregnant not deaf." Fran shakes her head at him and Niles rolls his eyes.
‘ Oy, a butler’s job is never done.’ He thinks to himself trotting behind Fran.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Max and the children laugh as soon as they know the coast is clear.
"Well, I better go downstairs. Can the three of you...."
"Go, Dad. Have fun, we can do this." Maggie tells her father and then looks at Brighton to continue, "if the troll here would read the directions this time."
"Hey, it was only a trial."
"Good one, Brighton. We’ll stick to that." Max chuckles walking out the door.
Behind that door, three of the most loving kids start back to work on Fran’s surprise.
~~~~~~~~~
Max settles into his chair behind his desk just as Fran walks in. He looks up and smiles at her. He pushes back his chair and strolls over to her, taking her hand in his as they both go to sit on the love seat.
"Darling, you’re up. Did you have a nice nap?"
"It was okay. I would have rather my handsome husband laid down next to me. Whatcha doing?"
"Oh, just putting together some new contracts. Are you ready to go? Our reservation is in an hour."
"Yeah, but before we go, will you brush my hair?" She gives him her puppy dog eyes.
"Of course I will." He takes the brush from her and turns her around. Max gently strokes the brush through each stand. He can feel Fran relax against him. Max smiles at her and after he’s done, he wraps his arms around her.
"Let’s stay like this." He whispers in her ear.
Fran grabs his hand and positions it on her belly. Max’s hand goes up and then back down, feeling the babies kick.
"Max, do ya feel that? Well, that’s our kids telling Mommy to eat. So as much as I would love to sit here like this, I think these two have other plans."
"Okay then let’s go." He slowly slides from behind Fran and helps her up. They walk out of his office hand in hand.
~~~~~~~~
About an hour later, Fran and Max are sitting at a romantic table for two at the Rainbow Room. Max begins the shopping conversation back up to see if Fran will bite.
"Fran, I’m sorry for not taking you shopping. I feel bad that you had to stay home and sit around bored all day."
"Max, I forgive you." She smiles trying not to laugh, but looking at Max, she sees him trying to stifle a laugh. "You know!"
"Yep!"
"Maxwell Sheffield, I’m ashamed of you."
"You’re ashamed of me, I’m not the one who went out shopping when her husband told her not to."
"But.....wait, how did ya know?"
"Fran, that doesn’t matter......"
She cuts him off, "That was you. I knew it. You were the dumb schlub who dropped everything in the store. Wait a minute, why were you at the mall?"
Fran amazes him every minute. He hadn’t realized she saw him and yet why is he shocked , Fran always seems to know everything.
"I wasn’t going to show you until later, but this is what I bought today." He pulls out the bag from Carters and hands it to Fran. She slowly opens the bag and sees the little outfit he bought for their daughter.
Fran gently lifts the outfit out as a single tear escapes her eye as she sees the leopard print jumper. She looks up and into Max’s wonderful eyes and suddenly a huge smile spreads across her face.
"Max..." Fran for the first time, is speechless and in shock in what her husband did. A minute or so later, Fran finds her voice. "Max, you bought this? Did ya pick up the wrong bag? I thought you found this print cheap and tacky."
"No, it’s the right bag. I just love giving you a hard time about animal print. Actually because of you, I’ve found myself buying it because I thought it was cute."
"Max.....you are so sweet. You know me so well. Wait--wanna know something funny? Look what I bought for our son today. It’s something that you would never in a million years think I would buy." She winks at him.
"You did say for our baby boy, right?"
"Yes, why?"
"Well, then it couldn’t be that black neglige I bought you." He laughs and tries again, "What about a cow print baseball outfit?"
"No, this." She hands him the bag from Carters. "It seems we read each other’s minds more than we think."
He opens the bag and sees the navy blue newborn suit with the nautical sign on it. He looks up at Fran and chuckles.
"I do not believe my wife bought this. Is this the same woman who told me how stupid the suit looked on Brighton and decided his entire wardrobe needed to be changed?"
"Yeah, but I never told you how sexy you look in it. Besides, you loved it and I thought maybe our son could share in a little of his Daddy’s style. Well at least until he’s one." Fran laughs and Max moves over closer to her, kissing her gently on the lips.
"It’s this connection we share, that only two people who are meant to be together have. And Baby you are definitely who I want to be with forever." Max asserts his point by kissing her again.
"Too bad I had to wait ‘til I was 29 to hear that." Fran remarks to Max looking directly into his face.
"Or 35." He retorts back.
"Max!" Fran whines in her usually tone, as Max smiles at her.
"Are you ready, Mrs. Sheffield? I have another surprise for you."
"Honey, another one. Predictable you aren’t anymore. How am I supposed know how to manipulate you if I can’t predict whatcha gonna do?"
"Blame yourself, Fran. You are the one always telling me to be more spontaneous. It seems ever since we got married, I’ve done just that. I believe it is all you."
"Great, me and my big mouth!" They both laugh as Max helps her out of her chair. Walking towards the exit of the restaurant, Max slides his arm around her waist.
~~~~~~~~~~~
Meanwhile, Maggie, Brighton, and Gracie are still upstairs putting the final touches to the twins’ room. Brighton gives up with the cribs and takes a break.
After he leaves the room, Grace turns to Maggie, "Hey Mags, let’s put the cribs together ourselves. Brighton just doesn’t have the Fine way, we do." She smiles as Maggie grabs a piece of the crib, starting to assemble them.
Brighton enters the babies’ room about twenty minutes later and there stands
two perfectly built cribs with dolls in them all tucked in. He looks at them and then looks at Maggie and Gracie, and then back at the cribs.
"No way! You did not do that. Okay, Niles, come on out, I know you helped them!" Brighton yells and looks around.
"Well we wanted to see them up before Fran has the twins." She laughs as Maggie high-fives Grace. "B, just admit that us Sheffield girls have a little more talent then you boys do." Gracie says chuckling at her brother’s look.
"Never! When our brother is born, him and I are sticking together."
"That’s fine, when our sister is born, it will just make one more female against the males in this house. Gracie, that will make how many boys vs. girls?" Maggie rubs it in Brighton’s face.
"Three boys and four girls. We still rule!"
The three of them push the cribs diagonal from each other over by the wall. Brighton leaves again to find the rocking chair that Max had restored. He brings in into the twins’ rooms as Grace and Maggie are adding stuffed animals in the corners of the room.
They stop in the middle of the room and look around. Every last detail is done, from the walls to the mobiles hanging from the ceiling. Niles had even helped put together the changing table, since Brighton refused his help with the cribs.
"Wait we forgot something." Brighton yells and runs out the door and comes back with two red ribbons, "Help me tie one on each crib."
Grace and Maggie exchange glances, grabbing a ribbon. They all look at each other and smile. Everything is done, even the placing of the baby monitor by the cribs.
They turn off the light, shutting the door behind them and head down the stairs awaiting the arrival of their parents.
As they stop on the last step, Fran and Max walk through the front door. Max looks at the kids and they nod their head, silently telling him that the room is finished.
"Max, what are you the four of you up to? Frans questions after she sees the looks exchanged between him and the kids.
"Why Fran, whatever do you mean?" He teases her taking her hand and kisses the palm of it.
"Maxwell, don’t play innocent with me. Remember, you’re playing against me. What’s going on?" Fran whines and heads over to the weakest link, Grace, "Gracie Honey, why don’t you tell me what you’re all hiding from me and better yet, what is your father’s surprise?"
"Sorry, Mom. But you will just have to go see for yourself. For once, I’m not spilling the beans." She grabs one of Fran’s hands and walks her over to Max.
Max grabs Fran’s other hand as the whole family guides Fran upstairs. At the top of the stairs, Max turns to Fran and caresses her cheek.
"Fran, close your eyes."
"No way. It’s bad enough I have no balance being pregnant, I’m not closing them." She whines even worse than she did a minute ago.
"Darling, you’ve never complained before when I’ve asked you to close your eyes." He whispers in her ear.
"Yeah, but I don’t think you’re about to jump out in a Zorro costume, accessorized with your very pointy sword." She whispers back making Max blush.
"Would you just trust me and close your eyes!" Max says trying to get the embarrassment out of his voice.
"Fine." She agrees but then she leans over to Max and whispers, "Order me around some more, would ya."
"Fran!"
"Okay, okay. I got the hint. They’re closing slowly, but they’re closing."
"Darling anytime now."
"Gesh, alright." Fran finally closes them and waits for her surprise.
Everyone helps her walk to the closed door of the twins’ room and stop. They look at each other and open the door. Max grabs Fran’s hand in his and Brighton switches the light on. Max takes a minute to look around and sees the beautifully decorated room his children put together.
Meanwhile, Fran’s getting anxious and finally speaks, "Hello! Can I please open my eyes?"
"Oh, sorry Darling. Of course."
Fran opens them and what she sees is the best present she’s ever been given. She slowly walks in the room, pulling Max in with her. She looks around and steps in front of the cribs. Fran runs her hand along one of the cribs and soon a happy tear escapes her eye.
"Max?"
"Yes?" He softly answers her, running a hand down her back.
"I don’t know what to say?"
"Oh my God! Someone call the ambulance. My wife is speechless." He teases her and she just smiles at him.
"Max, you did all this?"
"Well, actually the children helped out a lot. We did this for you."
Fran takes a minute and looks at every member of her family and her smiles gets bigger by the second. She walks around and looks at everything. She turns to Max and kisses him with everything she feels for him. A few moments later they come up for air.
"I love it! I love you all!" Fran changes her tone and looks at Max innocently, "Ah Max, there’s something I need to tell you. I already bought a lot of this and I’m having it delivered tomorrow."
"I know. Your partner in crime told me." Fran looks at Brighton and they both smile at each other. "I already took care of it. Darling, remember our conversation at dinner, well we really do know everything about each other." He kisses her again.
The three kids rush up and hug Fran. Maggie smiles as she feels one of the babies kick and the whole family stops, watching Fran’s stomach move under her dress. Max walks over and places his hand on Fran’s belly. The two of them just stare at one another.
A sudden contraction makes its way through Fran and she holds her belly tightly. She grabs onto Max trying to stand up.
"Fran, what’s wrong?"
"Ooooy!" Is the only thing that makes it out of Fran’s mouth.
"Darling, you’re hurting my hand." Max states after Fran clutches his hand so tight its turning purple.
"Maxwell, I’m so sorry. I’m having a contraction here, but you’re right I should be more sensitive to you." She starts sarcastically as she glares at him. She closes her eyes as the pain intensifies.
"A contraction? Oh my God, you’re in labor."
"No shit, Sherlock!" Fran retorts back.
Max begins to panic and leaves Fran’s side, until Fran yells at him.
"Maxwell Sheffield, get back over here! Don’t ya dare leave me. This is your fault too!" The pain eases but suddenly she tenses up again, "Oooy!"
"See Mom, I told you we shouldn’t have gone shopping." Brighton tries to lighten the mood a little, but it backfires.
"Brighton Milhouse Sheffield! If you value your life, I would SHUT UP if I were you!"
Maggie and Grace laugh at Fran’s reaction but stop as she glares at them.
Max tries comforting Fran, placing an arm around her and shifting all her weight onto himself. He helps her out of the room and slowly down the stairs. The children are all running all over the place grabbing her bag, trying to find Dr. Reynold’s number and calming down their father.
"Max! Hurry up! I’m about to give birth here!" Fran yells in pain.
"Darling, I’m trying. Niles is bringing the car around. Try to keep you’re mind off it."
"How? I feel like I’m gonna die here. Oy, you are so never touching me again."
"Fran don’t make threats you are going to regret later." He chuckles a little but Fran doesn’t find it too funny. She glares at him. "How about doing the breathing excises we learned."
"Oh, sure now you bring that up. You’re not gonna let it drop that I got us kicked out of Lamaze class, are you?" She closes her eyes once again and grabs his hand tighter, "Honey, I’m sorry. But please get me to the hospital so I can have that damn epiderrr...allll!!" Fran screams in the middle of another contraction.
Niles walks in and is ready to help, "Okay Sir, the limo is out front."
"Thanks Ol’ Man. Children follow us in the Jag, here’s the keys." Max tosses them to Brighton and helps Fran out the door and comforts her, "Come on Frannie, let’s go meet our babies."
For the first time since Fran started going into labor, she takes the time to look at Max and smiles.
"I love you!" Fran is holding on tight to Max’s hand.
"Fran, I just wish I could tell you how much I love you at this moment." Max sweetly remarks in her ear. "Just remember Darling, focus and breathe."
"Max, I don’t want to focus. I can’t focus, I can’t breathe. Oy, baby this hurts!" She screams, looking at him and trying not to cry.
"Fran I know."
"NO you don’t know!" Fran gently strokes her belly trying to make it better, but it doesn’t seem to help. Max places his hand on hers, as they rub her belly together. "By the way, we WILL name them Schlomo and Schloma."
"Fran, do we have to discuss that now?"
"YES!"
"Sweetheart, I love you and I love our children, but there is no way we are naming them that."
"Max, are you arguing with me?"
Max doesn’t answer as Fran grabs his tie and pulls. Brighton, Maggie and Grace laugh as they watch their parents disappear into the limo.
As the Sheffield’s begin the journey to the hospital, what could happen?...Oh, but I forgot we’re talking about Fran and Max, aren’t we?
TO BE CONTINUED...
The End
Thanks to Steffi for her continued support and ideas through each phase of this story and to Jenn for finding all the errors, which I think she's having fun doing! LOL!!
