Great Moments in Nanny History

Season Four

    
     

4.18 The Facts Of Lice

written by: Caryn Lucas

Niles is disgusted with his lot in life. Niles: Who thought up this system of the haves and the have not's anyway? Fran: That would be the haves.

When Mr. Sheffield has to reschedule Family Night, Fran is concerned that he isn't spending enough time with the children.

Gracie is sent home from school with head lice and the doctor confirms that the entire family has them... except Mr. Sheffield. Fran interprets that as meaning that he doesn't spend enough time with the kids.

Fran finds Niles' list of "to do" things that he dropped. But this list includes things like 'secure alibi, cut phone lines, tape mouth and clean up blood.' She tells Val about it and the two of them try to figure out what it could mean.

Val: Most serial killers have three names. John Wayne Gacy, Richard Allen Speck, Son of Sam! Fran: Oh Val what are we talking about here. We're not dealing with some sicko stranger. It's Niles! I know him very well. I stand behind Mr. Niles... the killer!

So Fran and Val break into Niles' room to see if they can find any evidence. While they are there, the morgue returns a call letting Niles know how long it takes for rigamortis to set in.

They hear Niles coming and hide before he catches them where they don't belong.	But she imagines Mr. Sheffield's reaction to a statement like that and figures he will just think she is the insane one and decides against telling him.
Fran is totally convinced by this time that Niles is a murderer and figures she has to tell Mr. Sheffield that she fears for her life.

Mr. Sheffield decides he should spend more time with the kids and takes them out for dinner leaving Fran alone in the house with Niles. She is terrified until Niles explains that he wrote a play and he wants her to read it.

The family returns early from dinner because Mr. Sheffield is now infected with lice. Fran: Mazel Tov. That means you've really bonded with your children.

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I Have A Dream
Written by Benny Anderson and Bjorn Ulvaeus