Season One
| Favorite Lines | Our Comments |
 Fran: I don't think it's normal. I mean, they all act as if Sarah never existed. |  Maxwell joins a country club and thinks it will be a perfect way to take the kids minds off the upcoming Mother's Day. |  Fran and Grace want to join the Mother-Daughter Pageant at the country club, but Max takes some convincing. |
 Grace and Fran practice their Magic Act for the Pageant. |  Maggie: I can't believe Dad's letting Gracie do this. Fran: I can't believe I'm letting Gracie do this. Maggie: No, I mean being in the pageant. Brighton: Dad doesn't even like to talk about mom. Fran: What was she like? Maggie: She was real pretty. Brighton: She had the best laugh. Maggie: And she always liked to sing. Brighton: Off key. |
 It's just separation anxiety. |
 Checking out the competition. |  Mother: You are not this child's mother. You're her nanny. Fran: Yeah, so? Mother: This is a Mother-Daughter Pagent. Fran: Well, we're very close. Grace: So what if she's not my mother, what's the difference? Mother: It's against the rules. Grace: Well, I don't have a mother. She died! |
 Girl: I just wanna be your friend. Your mom's real pretty. Grace: Thanks, but she's not my mom, she's my nanny. Girl: See ya. |
 Max: Sweetheart, I do understand how you feel. All those other girls with their mommies just reminded you how much you miss yours. Grace: But that's what's wrong, I don't miss her. Max: You don't? Grace: No, I don't remember her. ... How come you never talk about her? Max: Well sometimes it's very difficult for daddy. Grace: Oh. You can't remember her either? |  Grace: Do you think that mommy would want me to be in the pageant? Max: I think she would want whatever you want. Grace: I wanna do it. Me and Fran are gonna kick some country club butt! Fran: Oy! I don't know where she gets these things! |
 Anything you can do I can do better.... Since Grace forgot how to put Fran back together after sawing her in half, Fran refused to get back in the box. So for the pageant, they sang with their faces dressed up like puppets instead. [Where their chins become the dolls heads.] |  But Patti LaBelle and her daughter won the contest, and Fran and Grace came in second. |  "Mother" and "daughter" enjoying the show. |
 At home after the pageant, they all watched home movies to celebrate Mother's Day. First, they saw Fran as a child. |  Then Maggie and Brighton. [Young Brighton was played by Benjamin Salisbury's real life brother.] |
 Then Sarah and Gracie. |  Fran quietly comforts Maxwell as they watch. |
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Anything You Can Do
(from Annie Get Your Gun
words and music by Irving Berlin)
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I'm superior, you're inferior. I'm the big attraction, you're the small. I'm the major one, you're the minor one, I can beat you shootin', that's not all. SHE: Anything you can do, I can do better. I can do anything better than you HE: No, you can't SHE: Yes, I can HE: No, you can't SHE: Yes, I can HE: No, you can't SHE: Yes, I can! Yes, I can!! HE: Anything you can be, I can be greater. Sooner or later, I'm greater than you SHE: No, you're not HE: Yes, I am SHE: No, you're not HE: Yes, I am SHE: No, you're not HE: Yes, I am! Yes, I am!! I can get a partridge with a single cartridge SHE: I can get a sparrow with a bow and arrow HE: I can live on bread and cheese SHE: And only on that? HE: Yes. SHE: So can a rat HE: Any note you can reach, I can go higher SHE: I can sing any note higher than you HE: No, you can't SHE: Yes, I can HE: No, you can't SHE: Yes, I can HE: No, you can't SHE: Yes, I can! Yes, I can!! Anything you can buy, I can buy cheaper I can buy anything cheaper than you HE: 50¢? SHE: 40¢? HE: 30¢? SHE: 20¢? HE: No you can't SHE: Yes I can! Yes I can! HE: Anything you can say, I can say softer SHE: I can say anything softer than you HE: No, you can't SHE: Yes, I can HE: No, you can't SHE: Yes, I can HE: No, you can't SHE: Yes, I can! Yes, I can!! |
HE: I can drink my liquor faster than a flicker SHE: I can drink it quicker and get even sicker HE: I can open any safe SHE: Without getting caught? HE: Sure SHE: That's what I thought, you crook HE: Any note you can hold, I can hold longer SHE: I can hold any note longer than you HE: No, you can't SHE: Yes, I can HE: No, you can't SHE: Yes, I can HE: No, you caaaaaaaaaaaaaan't SHE: Yes, I caaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan! HE: Yes, you can!! SHE: Anything you can wear, I can wear better In what you wear, I look better than you HE: In my coat? SHE: In your vest HE: In my shoes? SHE: In your hat! HE: No you can't SHE: Yes I can! Yes I can! HE: Anything you can say, I can say faster SHE: I can say anything faster than you HE: No, you can't SHE: Yes, I can HE: Noyoucan't SHE: YesIcan HE: NOYOUCANT SHE: YESICANYESICAN HE: I can jump a hurdle SHE: I can wear a girdle HE: I can knit a sweater SHE: I can fill it better HE: I can do most anything SHE: Can you make a pie? HE: No SHE: Neither can I HE: Any note you can sing, I can sing sweeter SHE: I can sing anything sweeter than you HE: No, you can't SHE: Yes, I can HE: No, you can't SHE: Yes, I can HE: No, you can't SHE: Yes, I can, yes I cannnnnnnnn. |