Season Six
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 Fran is shocked that her mother is 'seeing' her doctor socially. Maxwell tries to reassure her. Fran: Why aren't you as shocked as me? Max: Well I'm, you know, European. Things are more accepted there. It's looser. It's freer. It's...... so wrong. |  Yetta, on the other hand, is excited at the prospect. Yetta: My daughter's dating a doctor? Wo--hoooo!! |
 At the doctor's office, Sylvia enjoys flirting and reassures him that her daughters would never interfere in her life decisions. |
 "Miss Blodgett" conspires to meet Dr. Rasso by pretending to feel ill, but is surprised to find that she likes him! |  Just then, C.C. gets the news that the kid that played the messenger was grounded and she needs a quick replacement that can portray a "weak, tired old man, beaten down by life." C.C.: Maxwell, wouldn't Niles be perfect for that part in our sitcom in L.A.? Niles: Me? What part? C.C.: Oh, if only there were a way I could see him on stage first.... Niles: Me? What part? Maxwell: C.C., I don't think this is a very good idea. Niles: Oh, you're always trying to hold me back. You're just terrified that people are gonna find out that someone in this house has more talent than you. Maxwell: You know what? Break a leg. |
 Meanwhile, back at home, Gracie is complaining that C.C., who is directing her school play Anthony and Cleopatra, is working the cast too hard. C.C.: How hard is it to play a pushy broad who runs around half naked with too much make-up on? Have you learned nothing from your mother? You're all off-script tomorrow or you're out. |
 Fran arrives home worried. Fran: Oh honey, we are in so much trouble. This guy that Ma is seeing -- he's handsome, he's romantic, he's a doctor, he can park wherever he wants. Daddy would have an affair with him! |  Sylvia arrives hot on Fran's heels. Sylvia: I would like a word in private with Miss Blodgett please. How dare you interfere with my affairs?? |  Sylvia explains that she is feeling neglected by Morty. The fight escalates until Sylvia finally leaves, telling Fran that they no longer have anything to say to each other. |
 The night of Gracie's play arrives. Grace does fine, but Niles has a little trouble. He can't bring himself to utter a single word. |  The woman behind them complains that she can't hear her son in the play over their noise. Sylvia: Big deal, what is he playing? The camel? And don't you yell at my daughter. She's pregnant with my new grandchildren. Fran: Yeah. (Softening) Yeah. Sylvia: (back to Val) Tell her that when her morning sickness kicks in, a little warm seltzer would help. Val: Oh my mother always said.... Sylvia: Tell her!! Val: Warm seltzer helps. Fran: Tell her thank you. |
 Fran and her mother are still going at it, with poor Val stuck in the middle. Fran: Tell her that she is not goin' out for Chinese with us after. Sylvia: Tell her that I would be happy to get it to go! |
 The next day, Fran is getting ready to tackle her father. Fran: Oh, there's my adorable husband. You know honey I am so glad that you set up your office here at the house.
|  Max thought he was ready for her, but he wasn't quite ready enough for our Fran. Fran: So what do you say, will you stick around and help me out with Daddy? Max: Oh Sweetheart, I'm so sorry, I'm afraid I have a meeting. Fran:Oh, you know they called, and canceled that meeting. Max: Oh. Oh well, in that case, I'm free as a bird. (Voice over) She canceled my fake meeting! |
 Morty arrives and Fran encourages him to be a little more romantic to Sylvia. He doesn't want to do it, but Fran convinces him he has to. Fran: If you don't smarten up, you are going to end up spending the rest of your life without her. Now is that what you want? |  Saturday night arrives, but Morty doesn't know how to do romantic. Max: Say, Morty, I bet every man in the place wishes he could change places with us right now. Morty: Why? I'm sitting under a vent here, it's blowing on me. Sylvia, you wanna switch? |  Morty: I'm trying to treat ya special. Sylvia: Why now, all of a sudden? Morty: Because.. .. because she said I should! Frannie this is no good, this isn't me. I'm not comfortable. I gotta get outta here. |
 Fran runs after her father, meeting someone on the way out of the bathroom. Fran: Oh excuse me, oh, your fly's open sir. |  Fran is shocked to discover Dr. Rasso in the bathroom with Morty, but uses the opportunity to point out to him that Sylvia is already married. Fran: Daddy, who's been married to my mother for forty years, this is Doctor Rasso. |
 Dr. Rasso helps Fran drive the point home to Morty. Dr. Rasso: Some other guy could come along and tell Sylvia..... all the things she really wants to hear from you. |
 Fran and Morty rejoin the others and Morty pours out his heart to Sylvia. Sylvia: Morty, I love you too. I just, I just don't feel special anymore. Our life, it's like, there are no surprises anymore. |  Morty provides the surprise when he breaks into "The Very Thought Of You." The very thought of you, and I forget to do the little ordinary things that every one ought to do. They dance, Sylvia enthralled. |
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The Very Thought Of You
(Words and Music By Ray Noble )
(Copyright 1934 by Campbell Connelly, Inc., and Warner Bros., Inc, renewed)
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The very thought of you, and I forget to do the little ordinary things that every one ought to do. I'm living in a kind of day dream, I'm happy as a king, and foolish though it may seem to me, that's ev'ry thing. The mere idea of you, the longing here for you, You'll never know how slow the moments go 'til I'm near to you. I see your face in ev'ry flower, your eyes in stars above, It's just the thought of you, the very thought of you, my love. |