7.12 Mr. Mom and the Producer

by

Kate the Dreamer
(Dreamkate1@aol.com)

Fran creeps towards the front door, Eve in a snugglie strapped to her stomach and Jonah in the baby back pack. She struggles to pull out her keys from her purse as she abandons the stroller on the stoop. She turns the lock very slowly, cautious so as not to wake the sleeping twins. Fran lets out a sigh of relief as she walks into the house. A few steps in she remembers the door and how a gust of wind can... Fran barely catches it with her foot moments before it would slam shut. With some careful shoulder shrugging and some cautious baby shifting, she slides the diaper bag off her shoulder and onto the floor where she is standing. She deposits the sleeping twins into the crib set up in the living room. Pushing her hair back from her face she discovers a glob of baby food stuck in it and attempts to identify it.

“Fabulous, I’m sure squished banana is great for split ends,” she says, pulling the goo from her hair. “Please don’t wake up,” She pleads softly, as she tiptoes among the toys and baby swings set up around the room. “Now if you guys can sleep for about an hour,” Fran continues in a low whisper as she collapses on the couch, “Mommy can take a lit-tle nap.”

Realizing she had just fallen on something, she sticks her hand under the couch cushion and pulls out her gold compact mirror. She opens it and examines the dark circles beginning to form under her eyes. “And Lord knows she needs it.”

Just as Fran closes her eyes....

“I’m home!” Brighton bellows as he throws his bag on the floor to join the mess.

“Shuuuuuush!” Fran squawks as she leaps up from the couch, arms flailing wildly. Brighton stops in his tracks, noticing the sleeping babies.

“Oh my gosh Fran, I’m...”

Fran holds her hands up. “It’s okay...” she whispers, glancing at the twins. “Thank god, you didn’t wake them up.”

Just then Maxwell walks into the house, and the door that Brighton has left ajar slams shut. Eve begins to stir and then lets out a piercing wail that could wake the dead. Fran, knowing what’s coming next runs to pick up Eve before... too late. Eve proceeds to tremble and tantrum, accidentally slapping her brother who lets out his own tsunami of a holler in turn.

“Hi Fran, I’m home.” Maxwell announces as he heads into the hall closet.

She was working in a bridal shop in Flushing, Queens,
'Til her boyfriend kicked her out in one of those crushing scenes.
What was she to do? Where was she to go? She was out on her fanny...
So over the bridge from Flushing to the Sheffield's door.
She was there to sell make-up, but the father saw more.
She had style! She had flair! She was there.
That's how she became the Nanny!

Who would have guessed that the girl we've described,
Was just exactly what the doctor prescribed?
Now the father finds her beguiling (watch out C.C.!).
And the kids are actually smiling (such joie de vive!).
She's the lady in red when everybody else is wearing tan...
The flashy girl from Flushing, the Nanny named Fran!

Today's episode has been brought to you by...

“Well fan-freakin-tastic, Fran mutters as she shifts Eve and picks up Jonah with her other arm. She attempts to balance the two squirming babies, gives up and flops on the couch with them.

Maxwell exits the walk-in hall closet and walks over towards Fran. “I was hoping you’d have them put down for a nap by now,” he says, clutching his temples. “Because I’ve had the worst day.”

All Fran can do is grit her teeth as she attempts calmness. "You're lucky you're so incredibly sexy or I might be really mad right now," Fran says, as her husband leans in to give her a kiss. "You think you've had a hard day? You have no idea about the sort of day I've been through.”

"I love you dearly sweetheart, but I doubt your day could have been as bad as mine. All you had to do is run a few errands and take care of the twins. I’m trying to run a Television show here. I had a huge Production meeting this morning you know. I don’t think you realize how stressful that is.”

"Brighton, would you please fold up the crib and take it upstairs.” Fran waits until Brighton leaves before continuing, “Oh as opposed to my carefree day! Allow me to paint you a picture. You know, the twins have a cold. You wanna spend the day with an aspirator sucking out baby snot?”

“I’m sorry the twins were sick, but all day long I’ve had to deal with actors gripes...I’m a commander of a whole army of people.”

“Oh, well, being the trooper that I am, I was up at eight anyway to wish you luck on your meeting and to see Gracie and Brighton off to school.”

“Not to mentioning battling traffic both ways just to get there.”

“I had to take B’s car to get to the pediatrician. Have you ever tried shoving a double stroller into a Porsche? I have, believe me, it’s not fun."

“Then, all day long, budget meetings, contract clauses. We are thousands of dollars over budget. Yesterday we had a sponsor pull out because we mentioned their competitor in a scene.”

Neither person is really listening to one another as they rattle off the lists of things they have done that day.

“I spent the afternoon picking up dry cleaning, foot spray, prescriptions, those chewable vitamins you like so much, not to mention going shopping for tonight, being that it's first night of Chanukah. I came back home expecting to get ready for this evening and then maybe take a nap. I went upstairs to find out that the brand new menorah I bought last Chanukah had been cracked in the move. So just as soon as I had stepped back into the house I had to go back out again. This delayed the twins nap and mine. After shlepping around town for another two hours I finally found a place which could fix menorahs.”

“And to top it all off I’ve had to deal with my star’s bloody dog yapping around the set!”

“At 5:30 you called me when I was driving home, re-exciting the drowsy twins. I drove around the block a few times and finally got them to sleep. And now thanks to you, they’re up again. So I very much don’t think your day could have been half as bad as mine. Especially for just putting on a show,” Fran says, sticking out her tongue.

“I called you because you beeped me.”

“Yeah so?”

“And anyway, putting on a show!” He takes Jonah from Fran and begins to rock him, “Is that what you think I do all day?”

“Well apparently you think all I do is sit around the house eating bon-bons and watching Oprah.”

They glare at each other for a minute before grunting and heading off in opposite directions, a twin for each of them.

“I can’t believe he said that!” Fran says, storming into the bedroom. “Can you believe your daddy said that?” she says as she bends down and picks up a random pacifier from a tub of them and shoves it into Eve’s mouth. This seems to make Eve happy as she gurgles and settles into Fran’s arms. She picks up the phone and dials. “Hey Val.”

“Hey Fran, what’s wrong?”

“Why do you think something’s wrong?”

“Well let's see, when you call me in the middle of the day it’s always been for one of three things. A, You got a date. I should hope that’s not it. 2, You have something you want to show off. You don’t sound excited enough. Or you have a problem."

“Gosh Val, you know me so well.”

“I should, I really don’t know much else. So, what’s the problem?”

“Max and I had a fight over who had a harder day.”

“Why should it matter?”

“Here, let me tell you what happened....”

“I can’t believe she said that!” Max says, storming into the kitchen. “Can you believe your Mommy said that?” he says as he bends down and picks up a random pacifier from a tub of them and shoves it in Jonah’s mouth. This seems to make Jonah happy as he gurgles and settles into Max’s arms.

“Said what?” Niles inquires as he walks through the kitchen door.

“Oh Niles, you’re home. Fran and I just had a huge fight over who works harder.”

“Why should it matter?”

“Because...because...because it does is all.”

“I hope the reasons you used with Mrs. Sheffield were more concrete than that.”

“Oh bother, you know what I mean.”

“Oh, I really should go to the witch doctor and get my clairvoyance fixed.” Niles says with an impish grin.

“Speaking of doctor’s appointments old man, don’t you and CC have an appointment with the obstetrician today?”

“Oh yes, that’s right.” He glances at his watch, “Is she in the cave?” he says, gesturing out to the guest house.

“She should be.”

“Well then I better go get her, it’ll take us a good twenty minutes to grease up the doorway and Fran will not be pleased if we're late tonight.”

“I don’t know how you get away with it Niles. If I had said even one of those fat zingers to Fran when she was pregnant...I’d still be sleeping on the couch. What happened to normalcy.”

“Sir, we’re about as normal as Warren G. Harding himself.”

“Hello CC, Niles, Baby, how are the three of us today?”

“Hello Dr. Pomeranz, we’re fine,” they reply.

“OK CC, we're just going to give you a few tests today to make sure everything’s going on schedule.”

“What sorts of tests Doctor?” CC inquires, a little nervous.

“Oh nothing too serious, don’t worry. I would like to do another ultrasound, check the baby’s heart rate. And I’m going to give you a basic physical, just like you get at your regular doctor for a check-up. Oh, and a stress test.” The doctor proceeds to poke and prod and do his thing. Twenty minutes later, the doctor is going over the results with them.

“CC, the baby seems to be fine. Heart rate and development normal. But I’m afraid we need to have a little talk about stress.”

“Stress? I'm not under any stress," CC says as her beeper goes off and she jumps.

“I am not pleased at all with the results of the stress test or your blood pressure. You are a first time Mommy over thirty five. You need to take it easy. Which for you means cutting down on your work hours. You have a partner, let him take the bulk of the work for a while.”

“But Dr. Pomeranz....” CC tries to reach for the beeper as Niles grabs it and turns it off.

“No 'Buts' CC. I’m going to get you some pamphlets on stress and pregnancy. Niles, you’ll have to keep on top of her.”

“But she likes to be on top,” Niles mutters under his breath.

Fran enters the family room, a plate of latkes in one hand and a box of matches in the other. The room has been decorated festively with all sorts of Hanukkah decorations. The lights are dimmed softly, giving the room an aura of calmness and quiet.

“BRIGHTON, GRACIE, NIIIILES, MS. BABCOCK, MAXWEEEEEEL!” Fran screeches.

Eve and Jonah, who are seated in their high chairs, decide to bang their fists on their trays in time with Fran’s hollering. Everyone assembles in the room, the center of attention quite clearly the menorah and the twins. Fran, Eve and Jonah are all wearing matching blue and white sweaters with giant Jewish stars on them.

Gracie glances between Fran and the twins.

“What?” Fran asks innocently, “They were having a special mother daughter sale.”

Brighton points to Jonah, “Okay so I put Evie’s pink hat on him, they don’t gotta know he’s not a girl. Let’s just get started shall we?”

“I still don’t see why we have to be here,” CC mutters.

“Because CC, Niles is part of our family, and now so are you. I want the twins to have the full holiday experience. I’d like to start a tradition now of Happy Holidays, which means no fighting.” She turns to Max, “None.”

“Fran I just don’t think you really appreciate the hard work that I do every day.”

“Oy, let’s not start in on this again.”

“Fran, Dad, can we just agree to disagree,” says Gracie. “You each have different roles in this house, we all do, it doesn’t mean that they are any less important than the other.”

“You should try living in my shoes for a week, then you’d see,” Fran and Max say simultaneously.

“That’s it!” Grace proclaims, “You two can switch places for a week.”

“Gracie darling, life just doesn’t work that way,” Max is quick to interject.

“Dad, you said so yourself. You guys aren’t taping any new episodes this week, it’s all rehearsing and maintenance since you were preempted for that TV Movie. Fran’s smart enough to supervise that.”

Fran puts her arm around Gracie’s shoulder. “That’s right, and you could take care of the twins for the week. ”

“A whole week?” says Max.

“Yes, one week, seven days. As a matter of fact, let’s call it to the last day of Hanukkah,” Fran says, extending her hand.

“I don’t know Fran...”

“That is, unless you think you aren’t up to the challenge.”

That is all Maxwell needs to hear. “You have yourself a bet,” he says as they shake hands.

“This oughta be good,” CC says with a smirk.

“Yes shouldn’t it, you and Mrs. Sheffield...business partners,” Niles says with an evil grin.

Suddenly the implications of the deal hit CC as her face twitches.

"What!?" CC screeches.

"Sshhh, Dr. Pomeranz said no stress."

"Well, that's going to be kinda impossible if I have to work with her!" C.C. hisses back, pointing to Fran who is calmly striking a match.

“Baruch atai adonai....”

“Gracie, you’re wearing your present. I’m glad you like it.”

“I love it Fran, thanks.”

Niles enters with a fresh pot of tea and pours a round.

Fran smiles and redirects her attention to the Variety Magazine she is trying to read. CC, who is sitting across from her, is desperately trying to inform her on what exactly she and Maxwell do each day.

“Nanny Fine, would you pay attention!”

“I’m trying to, but I thought this magazine was about TV networks and stuff. All it talks about are peacocks and eyes and something called a weblet. And what the heck are syndies? How am I supposed to learn about network brass this way?” Fran says, refocusing herself in the paper. Just then Jonah and Eve begin to stir from upstairs.

Fran begins to rise from her seat before Niles pushes her down again. “You wanted to switch places...”

“I know but Niles...”

“Mr. Sheffield is up there.”

Max’s eyes pop open, shaking him from his deep sleep. “So much for being able to sleep in,” he comments to himself as he rolls over, sits up and puts on his slippers. “All right all right, Daddy’s coming,” Maxwell announces as he walks into the nursery.

Just then Fran appears at the doorway. “CC and I are leaving now,” Fran announces, “I just thought I’d come up here and say goodbye to the twins.” She leans over and scoops up Eve, rocking her for a few moments before kissing her head and putting her back down to do the same to her brother. “I guess I’ll be going now...”

“See you tonight,’ Max says, getting out the diapers from the closet. Fran shrugs her shoulders and exits.

“Okay guys, it’s just the three of us now.”

“Okay Nanny Fine, you are in my territory now. Just stick close, nod along and don’t touch anything,” CC says, barging across the studio floor. Not hearing a response she turns around.

“Nanny Fine? Nanny Fine? FRAN?” CC finds Fran at the buffet table, chatting it up with a few members of the crew while stuffing miniature meatballs into her mouth. “Nann...”

“Ahem,” Fran coughs, nodding towards the crew.

“Mrs. Sheffield,” CC sputters out through gritted teeth, “We have to get to the office now.” CC leads Fran down a long corridor. Entering a door at the end of the hallway they find the production office. The room is spacious and split into two sides, Max’s desk and CC’s.

“Now this is more like it,” Fran says, collapsing into the large office chair. “I could get used to this.”

Just as Fran settles into the chair, a group of people rush into the office.

“I need approval on this fabric,” says the costume designer, shoving a piece of cloth in Fran’s face.

“The whole second act just isn’t working,” complains a writer.

“The ratings are in, Mr. Sherry needs to speak to you.”

A large stack of papers is pushed on the desk to join the script and the pile of fabric.

“You are needed on the set,” announces Fred, who has popped in with a box of donuts.

“The exterior shots from New York City haven’t arrived yet.”

“Well?” they all say in unison.

Fran glances over to CC who was very much enjoying the view.

“WAAAAAAAAAAH!” The twins screech out in unison. Maxwell struggles to reach the giant box of diapers on the top shelf of the nursery closet. Both twins are on the changing table, waiting for fresh diapers. He balances on his tiptoes, fingers grasping at the box seams.

"Why did Fran have to buy the economy size??" he says, struggling to reach the box. Just then, the box of diapers opens, its contents pouring on top of his head.

"Bloody he..." Maxwell glances at the twins, "heck it all." He picks up two diapers and heads over to the changing table. When Maxwell reaches the twins, he discovers that Eve had gotten a hold of the baby powder. In the true spirit of sibling rivalry, she has dumped some on her brother's head. Jonah is now coughing up small puffs of white powder.

"Eve!" Max scolds. Jonah, in perhaps an attempt to showcase his displeasure, decides to "shower" his father's shirt. Maxwell jumps back, but not before his fourth shirt of the day has been soiled. Max tries his best to stay calm as he strips down to his undershirt and puts fresh diapers on the twins. Maxwell takes the twins down from the table and places them on to the blanket spread across the floor.

"Okay, now you two play nice and Daddy's going to read the paper," he says, settling into a chair with the New York Times. "See, this isn't so hard," Max thinks to himself, settling into an article about Hillary Clinton's Senate run.

After a few minutes Max begins to question the quiet. He glances up to discover that both twins are gone and there is a trail of Cheerios leading out the door.

"Oy, now what?" he says, following the trail across the hall and into the master bedroom. He finds Eve, Jonah, and the bag of Cheerios sitting on the treadmill.

"There you are," he says, picking them up and returning them to the nursery.

"I think I'm going to have to keep you two in the playpen, my mischievous children." The playpen is apparently not where the twins want to be, as they proceed to cry until Max finally gives in.

Hungry himself, he totes them downstairs for a snack. Forty five minutes later Max has had his fill of strained peas and it seems as if hardly a spoonful has made its way into the twins' mouths. So it was back upstairs for a fresh shirt and the fifth change of clothes for the twins that day. After their bath he didn't even bother with another shirt, he is now up to lounging around topless.

Maxwell glances at his watch. "Great, Three o'clock, nap time."

Putting the twins to bed turns out to be harder than expected. By five he is so exhausted he falls asleep on the couch. The twins gurgle happily in their swings, mesmerized by Teletubbies.

“CC, I thought you said you were going to take it easy. It’s already six.” Niles says, pointing at the wall clock as CC is hanging up her coat. She opens the refrigerator and grabs a pudding

“I know you can hear me, your ears are big enough.”

“Niles, I am not giving up my work, and that’s that.”

“No one said give up, I just said take it easy.”

“One of us has to make a living butler boy.”

“Listen Cruella...”

“No, you listen you...you! When you told me I had to give up booze, I said fine. When you said no tight fitting clothes I said, whatever, I’m no Nanny Fine. When you said just when I had lost all that weight and gotten down to my ideal size and I was now going to balloon up all over again....well, after I kicked you I felt better. But there is no way in hell I’m giving up my work. It’s what I live for, it’s what I’m good at. And NOBODY is going to take it from me.” With that CC storms out.

Fran walks in through the foyer, dropping Max’s briefcase on the table.

“I don’t know how you use this briefcase, I couldn’t find any shoes to match it.”

“Huh?” Maxwell says groggily.

“Max, were you sleeping?”

“Um, no,” he says, springing up from the couch. “I was just watching some TV with the twins.”

“Oh really, and where are they?” Fran says with a note of victory in her voice.

“They're in their....Oh my god. They were just...”

Just then Niles walks in the room with the twins in his arms.

“Being taken care of by Niles, yes, hello again Niles.”

“How are my babies?” Fran cooes at the twins who are obviously very happy to see Mommy. Niles hands Jonah over to Fran and Eve to Maxwell, taking Fran’s coat and putting it in the closet.

“So, honey, how was your day?” Max asks, trying to sound as nonchalant as possible.

“Um...it was pretty exciting. I looked at scripts, I picked fabrics...and most of all, I did lunch.”

“Oh, well, life here was pretty easy too. You know, I fed the kids, I read the paper and of course we watched some giant British fuzzy things jump around and hug each other."

“Teletubbies Sweetheart.”

“Yes well...”

“Um...”

“Happy?” they ask simultaneously.

Gracie walks into the room, eyes glazed like a zombie.

“Hi Gracie, how was school?” Grace turns and puts her coat in the closet.

“Hello, earth to Gracie?”

“He asked me out,” she manages to stutter.

“Oh my god,” Fran says, practically jumping up and down. “Who asked you out? Who asked you out?”

“What if he dumps me, I don’t do well with rejection. Or better yet, what am I going to wear?”

“Take a deep breath honey, it’s just a date.”

“Does this boy have a name?” questions Maxwell.

“Patrick Daddy, his name is Patrick."

“And a last name?”

“I’m an independent woman of the Nineties, I’m not going to take his last name,” Gracie proclaims indignantly.

"Oy," Maxwell groans.

“Come on Sweetheart, lets go pick out what you’re going to wear.”

“I have some contracts Maxwell needs to sign, where is he?”

“He’s in the living room with the kids. You didn’t have to come all the way over here with them, I could’ve gotten them.”

“Nanny Fine, I’m pregnant, not an invalid. Do you know that woman on farms in some countries keep working right until they give birth, have the baby in the field, and then keep on working.”

“Did you also know that they average life expectancy of those women is about twenty seven,” Niles interjects, bringing in more potatoes from the pantry.

“Well, I’m just going to bring this food into the other room. Don’t forget, at sundown we need to light the candles,” Fran says, backing out of the room.

“Shamu!”

“Dust Bunny!” With that they come together in a passionate kiss.

“I’m sorry Niles, but all this is all so new to me.”

“It’s new for me too you know.”

“Before this,” she says, gesturing to her swelled belly, “I thought the only way a child would make it’s way into my stomach would be if I ate one.”

“You know, I think that’s the first time you referred to the baby as a child. Remember, it won’t be a baby forever. Before you know it he or she will be off running around and you’ll be able to work just as hard as ever.”

"Niles, you just don't understand. Unlike you, I need to work. I have this insatiable desire to..."

"Dominate people. Chastise them. Make them feel extremely used?"

CC lets out an evil chuckle, "Yeah."

"That's what I'm here for."

“I can’t believe it’s already the seventh night of Chanukah,” Brighton comments as he spins the dreidel. “Ha Grace, it’s nun, I win again, pay up.”

“I thought Fran said gimmel was the one where you take all?”

“Um, no she didn’t,” he says, shoving a piece of chocolate gelt into his mouth. “So Fran, how does it feel to be the breadwinner?” says B, eager to change the subject.

“Um,” Fran says, swallowing a bite of latke. “It’s great,” she says with anything but a confident grin.

“You know Fran,” interrupts CC, “Tomorrow is Friday, which means we have to set up everything for all of next week. Be ready to work twice as hard.”

“And,” says Niles, winking at CC, “Tomorrow is the twins play-group. Fran, isn’t this week our turn to host it?”

Both Fran and Max’s eyes widen. “I wanna switch back,” they blurt out simultaneously.

“You do?”

“You do?”

“Thank god!” CC proclaims. Everyone turns to stare at her, “Um, I mean, Thank God we um, can all be, um...where are those potato lot-cakes?”

“Latkes,” everyone corrects her, laughing.

“I love you sweetheart,” says Max.

“Love you more.”

"I’m gonna be sick...” says CC. Niles nudges her, “Sick if I don’t get some apple sauce to go with this.” CC corrects herself with a meek smile.

“Good witch,” Niles says, patting her on the head.

"And so ends another festival of lights," Fran says, dimming the bedside lamp. "I'm glad tonight we could celebrate the eighth night of Chanukah with everything back to normal."

“You know Honey, I’m so glad this whole mess is over with.”

“What, Chanukah?” Fran asks with a grin.

“Now that isn’t over until sun-up. See I know, I'm a good honorary Jew."

There is a long pause.

“You’re not gonna say it are you?”

“I’ll say it right after you do.”

“How about we say it on the count of three?”

“Okay”

“One...two...three...”

“I’m sorry I was wrong you have a hard job too,” Max blurts out, “Fran!”

“Yes?” Fran asks with a mischievous smirk on her face.

“You were supposed to say it too! Oh you,” Max says, leaning across the bed to give his wife a kiss.

“I’m sorry I downplayed your role in this house, " Fran says kissing Max on the cheek, "It’s just hard to feel sorry for you working in your fancy shmancy studio when I’m cooped up in the house being forced to watch Barney.”

“But?”

“But spending a week in your shoes did show me that you really do work very hard to put out a successful show each week.”

“You know, Gracie was right. We do each have different roles in this house, it doesn’t mean that any one role is more important than the other.”

“We raised a pretty smart kid huh?” says Fran with a smile.

“You did...I just sorta came along for the ride,” Max says, leaning over and caressing Fran’s cheek. “Here, I have something for you,” he turns over and reaches into his night stand drawer. He pulls out a small velvet box. “I was saving this for Christmas, but I want to learn how to celebrate your holidays too. You’re Jewish, two of our children are Jewish and I have to learn that for you, Chanukah is the holiday of the season.”

“That’s so sweet....wait, that doesn’t mean I won’t get Christmas gifts too does it?” Fran's face wrinkles up with worry.

“No.”

“Oh phew, just checking.”

Max holds out the small velvet box, “Fran, I don’t know what I would do without you in my life. You gave me back my children, and now you've blessed me with two new ones. And for those gifts, I shall love you forever.”

“Aww Max.”

“But something happened this week that I never thought was possible.”

“What’s that?”

“I love you more.”

Fran takes Max’s face in her hands, “I love you soo much.”

Max takes the small box and opens it to reveal a small locket.

“Where did you get this picture of me?”

“Your mother.”

“Max honey, it’s beautiful,” she proclaims, as he strings it around her neck and clasps the chain.

“Happy Chanukah Ms. Fine.”

“Happy Chanukah Mr. Sheffield.”

‘Twas the Night After Chanukah

‘Twas the night after Chanukah and all through the estate
Not a person was astir, except for two who’re up late

The kids were asleep, all snuggled in bed.
The butler in the guest house, keepin' his wife fed.

Deep in dreamland, each of them lay
While two certain lovers took a roll in the hay

When what should I hear coming out of their room
I heard some loud sounds and a very loud boom.

“Oh Sweetie, oh Honey, oh Darling, Oh I...
Oh Maxwell, oh Max, oh work it, OH MY!"

“So, do you like your present honey?” She said out of breath
“Oh yes, yes, yes, Yes, Yes, YES!"

And I heard her exclaim, as their voices faded into the night:
“This is the best Chanukah you’ve eva had, right?”

I’d like to extend a special Thank You to IvanaBGood and to Sabine [God bless your nitpicking] for all their help and support. And of course as always Val who is forever inspiring me and who co-wrote the end poem. What would I do without you guys!
BIG HUG!
This story is dedicated to my father, who although he has passed away has past on to me a love of writing I shall have always. It is also dedicated to all the Jewish kids out there who hardly ever get to see a sitcom celebrate Chanukah.

HAPPY CHANUKAH EVERYONE!

So wha'd ya think? Any good? Be sure
to post your two cents worth on the

7.13 Ode to Chastity Claire by IvanaBGood A very pregnant wife going through jealous rages has Niles in a quandary. Meanwhile, Brighton falls in love with a classmate and doesn't know how to make her notice him, until Fran comes up with an answer to both of their problems.

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