7.35 The Never-ending Story
by
Kate The Dreamer
(Dreamkate1@aol.com)
INT: SHEFFIELD LIVING ROOM - MID DAY
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FRAN (ON PHONE) Yes, I see the pattern comes in blue and white for the baby dress, but can I select another fabric? Well I was thinking leopard print. Hello? Why are you laughing? |
MAXWELL ENTERS, THE TWINS TODDLING BEHIND HIM
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MAXWELL Sweetheart, did you call the caterers yet? FRAN (CLICKING OFF THE CORDLESS PHONE) No honey, not yet. I was gonna call right after I ordered the twins outfits. MAXWELL Fran, they’re going to be one, I don’t think there’s a dress code. |
C.C. ENTERS, DEEPLY ENGROSSED IN HER CELL PHONE
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FRAN (POINTING TO C.C.) Tell that to her. C.C. What do you mean they don’t lend jewels for babies? This is my daughter’s big premiere. No, she won’t choke. How am I sure, hello, she’s a Babcock! |
MAXWELL TAKES THE CORDLESS PHONE FROM FRAN AS SHE PICKS UP JONAH
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MAXWELL Why don’t I call the caterers and you take the twins for a while? C.C. (SLAMMING CELL PHONE ON THE TABLE) Can you believe that, I can’t get any jewelers to make a set for Emily. MAXWELL She’s a baby CC, you’re supposed to play Peek-a-boo with them, not dress up (COVERS EYES) Where’s my Evie, where’s my...darn, where’s the phone number for the caterers. FRAN It’s in the office Max. |
MAXWELL SETS EVE IN THE PLAYPEN AND EXITS
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C.C. I know she’s a baby (BEAT) but my family is flying in for this party. This will be the first time they see Emily. I just want to give them the best possible first impression. FRAN So they’ll forget her daddy used to scrub toilets? C.C. Yes....I mean no....I mean....damn you. FRAN I know I know, I’m evil. Isn’t mommy evil Jonah, evil evil eeeevil. (TICKLING JONAH AND THEN PLACING HIM IN THE PLAYPEN) C.C. Not that I wouldn’t love to continue this, but I have to go (BEAT) do some paperwork for our network brass meeting tomorrow. FRAN (TO TWINS)You see that guys, someday you’ll be doing that too. GRACE (OFFSTAGE) FRAN! |
INT: GRACE’S BEDROOM (CONTINUOUS)
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GRACE (HOLDING HAND OVER PHONE RECEIVER) Maggie’s on my line. She said she’s been trying to get through on the main line for an hour. She wants to give you her flight information. FRAN (TAKING PHONE) Oy, I feel like I have been on one everlasting phone call all day. GRACE It takes a lot of planning to bring everyone together. FRAN (ON PHONE) LAX flight 124 11 what...Mmm, I’ll send your sister and brother with the limo, okay? We can’t wait to see you either. The twins are so big, they miss their biggest sister. Okay Maggie, we’ll see you then. Love you more. bye. (HANGS UP PHONE) Who knew planning a simple birthday party/double anniversary would be so hard. MAXWELL (OFF CAMERA) Fran, I can’t find that phone number! C.C. (OFF CAMERA) NANNY FINE, Is a rash like this normal on a baby? |
SFX: BABIES CRYING
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FRAN (FLOPPING ON BED) OY! |
She was working in a bridal
shop in Flushing, Queens,
'Til her boyfriend kicked her out in one of those crushing
scenes.
What was she to do? Where was she to go? She was out on her
fanny...
So over the bridge from Flushing to the Sheffield's door.
She was there to sell make-up, but the father saw more.
She had style! She had flair! She was there.
That's how she became the Nanny!
Who would have guessed that the girl we've described,
Was just exactly what the doctor prescribed?
Now the father finds her beguiling (watch out C.C.!).
And the kids are actually smiling (such joie de vivre!).
She's the lady in red when everybody else is wearing tan...
The flashy girl from Flushing, the Nanny named Fran!
INT: SHEFFIELD DINING ROOM- DAY. THE TWO COUPLES ARE SITTING AROUND THE TABLE MULLING OVER PARTY PLANS. JUST THEN THE PHONE RINGS, MAXWELL ANSWERS IT.
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MAXWELL (ON PHONE) Hello. I see...I see...no no, well, we tried our best. Thank you bye. FRAN What’s wrong Maxwell? MAXWELL That was the network, the show isn’t on the line-up for next season. FRAN I don’t understand Max, I thought the show was doing well. MAXWELL Fran Darling, I’m afraid show business is complex. FRAN What can be more simple than people watch it, so keep it on. C.C. So you’d think, but people out here are vultures (BEAT) I’m going to miss it. NILES Does that mean that its officially canceled? MAXWELL Well...officially...the details are.... C.C. We’ve been canned. MAXWELL (SIGHING LOUDLY) Quite, (RISING FROM HIS CHAIR) Well, we knew coming out here was a risk. Such is life. It’s a good thing we didn’t get too invested here. FRAN (GETTING UP) Wait wait, hold your horses...you mean that’s it? Wham bam, we’re moving back to New York? MAXWELL I thought you’d be happy about this Fran, I mean, I thought you missed New York. FRAN Well, I did...I mean, I do...but well, we’ve gotten settled here. Brighton and Grace are in school here, Ma and Daddy and Yetta all enjoy their new place....we can’t just uproot them again. MAXWELL Fran Fran, calm down. Would you excuse us? |
FRAN AND MAXWELL EXIT TO BACKYARD
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NILES I knew we should have installed an intercom in the backyard. |
EXT: SHEFFIELD BACK YARD (CONTINUOUS)
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MAXWELL Fran, I thought you understood that this wasn’t a permanent move. FRAN I did...I just didn’t expect to get so settled here. Before you, I never thought I’d get outta Flushing, and here I am moving from Manhattan to Beverly Hills and back to New York. I feel like a I’m playing leap frog. It’s just a lot of adjustments...new houses, new friends, getting new store credit cards. I’ll miss (SNIFF) Rodeo Drive. MAXWELL Canceling a television show is tougher than I thought. FRAN I could have told you that, I mean, it ain’t no picnic. People get emotionally attached to characters, you like following their lives, I remember when my favourite.... MAXWELL I meant on our family. FRAN Oh (BEAT) that too. |
THEY KISS
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FRAN I guess tomorrow’s party will be a Double Anniversary/Birthday/Goodbye Party (BEAT) How the heck are we going to fit all that on one cake? |
INT: NILES’ AND CC’S LIVING ROOM - EVENING
SFX: PHONE RINGS
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C.C. Hello? MR. SHERRY Hello C.C. , Sherry here. Sorry about the show. C.C. What can you do, show business is tough. MR. SHERRY See, that’s what I like about you, the skin of a rhino. That’s why I’m calling. C.C. To compliment me on being like a giant smelly animal? MR. SHERRY To offer you a position as a full time staff producer at the studio. C.C. Staff producer? MR. SHERRY Don’t say anything ‘til you’ve heard all the perks. You get a studio house right near the lot, day care, big salary, primo parking spot. What do you say Babcock, do we have a deal? |
NILES ENTERS, EMILY IN HIS ARMS
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NILES Who’s on the phone? C.C. Mr. Sherry, I’ll have to discuss this with my husband and get back to you. Bye. NILES Was that the studio? C.C. Yes, they just offered me a job. NILES That’s great, did you call Mr. Sheffield? C.C. No no, just me. NILES Ooooh (THEN REALIZING) oh. |
A LONG PAUSE...
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NILES I don’t know what to say, I’ve sorta gotten attached to the Sheffields and they are moving back to New York . Although Although I do like California. |
C.C. I don’t know what to tell you. I’ve sorta gotten used to Max's family, I'd sort of miss them. Although I do like California. |
THEN...
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NILES What did you say? C.C. What did you say? NILES That I like California? C.C. Oh yeah, I like California too. |
INT: PARTY HALL - EVENING EVERYONE HAS GATHERED FOR THE BIG PARTY. EVERYONE IS OUT ON THE DANCE FLOOR AND SEEMS HAPPY....WELL, EVERYONE EXCEPT ONE GLOOMY BUTLER AND HIS WIFE AND ONE GLOOMY KID.
MAXWELL AND FRAN ARE DANCING BESIDE THE TWINS WHO ARE TRYING THEIR BEST TO IMITATE THEIR MOM AND DAD. FRAN AND MAXWELL LOOK DOWN AT THE TWINS AND SMILE.
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MAXWELL May we cut in? |
FRAN SWIPES JONAH UP AND BEGINS TO “DANCE” WITH HIM AS MAXWELL DOES THE SAME WITH EVE. JUST THEN MAXWELL NOTICES GRACE SULKING AT A NEARBY TABLE. MAXWELL PASSES EVE OFF TO BRIGHTON AND HEADS OVER TO THE TABLE.
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MAXWELL Don’t you like the party sweetheart? GRACE Sure Daddy, (SIGH) it’s great. MAXWELL Why don’t I believe you. |
SWITCH TO:
NILES AND C.C. ARE SITTING ACROSS THE ROOM LOOKING EQUALLY GLUM. FRAN MAKES HER WAY OVER TO THEIR TABLE.
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FRAN Okay guys, here’s the deal. Big party, happy smiles, see! (PLASTERS A BIG GRIN) |
NILES AND C.C. FLASH FAKE GRINS.
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FRAN God, who died? I thought you’d guys would be happy to get back to New York? C.C. is this because your family canceled on you? C.C. No, I could care less. I mean, how many times does one get invited to the Kennedy Compound? FRAN Aren’t you guys happy about going back to New York? C.C. That’s just it, we’re not sure were going with you guys. NILES Sherry offered her a permanent job at the network |
JUST THEN GRACE STANDS UP ACROSS THE ROOM
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GRACE Daddy, I’m just not sure I want to go back with you guys. I want to say here, Can’t I stay with Brighton? |
FRAN CATCHES A LOOK OF PANIC ON HER FACE AS...
FLASH-FORWARD- 10 YEARS LATER..... FRAN IS OLDER NOW, BUT STILL DOESN’T LOOK A DAY OLDER THAN 29. SHE IS IN THE FRONT END OF THE LIVING ROOM IN THE NEW YORK TOWN HOUSE, ARRANGING FLOWERS.
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FRAN Maxwell! Jonah! Evie! They’ll be here any minute, get your tushies down here. |
MAXWELL TROTS DOWN THE STAIRS, LOOKING BASICALLY THE SAME. A TOUCH MORE GREY HAS BEEN ADDED TO HIS STREAK. FOLLOWING HIM ARE JONAH AND EVE, NOW ALMOST 11 YEARS OLD. EVE HAS TURNED OUT TO BE A SPITTING IMAGE OF HER MOTHER. SHE IS FOLLOWED BY HER BROTHER, A LITTLE MAXWELL IF EVER THERE WAS ONE.
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EVE Mommy mommy, are they here yet? Cause if they’re not I want to try on my blue party dress. JONAH Eve, if you change your clothes one more time I’m gonna hurl. FRAN Jonah....Not yet Sweetie, but Uncle Niles called from the airport over forty five minutes ago, so they should be here any minute. |
SFX: DOORBELL
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JONAH & EVE They’re here, they’re here!!! |
JONAH AND EVE BOUND AT THE DOOR AND THROW IT OPEN. THERE IS NILES AND EMILY, WHO IS NOW TEN.
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JONAH & EVE (CONT'D) Uncle Niles! |
NILES THROWS HIS ARMS AROUND THE TWINS WHILE EMILY HANGS SHYLY TO HIS COAT. THE YEARS HAVE BEEN GOOD TO NILES, WHO OTHER THAN GREYING HAIR LOOKS ABOUT THE SAME. TEN YEARS OF LIVING WITH MONEY IN HIS POCKET HAS SERVED TO IMPROVE HIS WARDROBE. EMILY IS DRESSED IN A BLUE JUMPER AND HER SANDY BLOND HAIR IS IN RINGLETS.
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NILES Hey kids, my you guys are getting big. You’re gonna be taller than me soon. (THEN) Jonah, Evie, I want you to meet my daughter Emily. |
EMILY PROCEEDS TO BURY HER HEAD IN HER FATHER’S SIDE. FRAN STEPS FORWARD
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FRAN Guys, give them some breathing room. They’re going to be here the whole week. Niles, come in the door. |
FRAN AND NILES EMBRACE, THEN MAXWELL AND NILES SHAKE HANDS
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FRAN Boy have I missed you. MAXWELL Good to see you Old Man, it’s been too long. How’s the writing? NILES It’s going well. I’m up for another book tour soon enough. MAXWELL Where’s C.C.? NILES She’s arguing with the driver. MAXWELL Some things never change. |
FRAN BENDS DOWN TO EMILY’S LEVEL
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FRAN Emily darling, I know you don’t remember us. I used to help take care of you when you were a baby. I’m your Aunt Fran and this is your Uncle Max. And these two rugrats are your cousins Evie and Jonah. You’ll be staying in Evie’s room. EMILY (SHY) Hi NILES I think she’s still recovering from the plane ride. FRAN Kids, why don’t you take Emily upstairs and show her your room. |
THE TWINS RUN UPSTAIRS WITH EMILY RELUCTANTLY IN TOW.
JUST THEN GRACE WALKS IN, FOLLOWED BY BRIGHTON. GRACE HAS CHANGED A LOT IN THE 10 YEARS. SHE'S NOW TWENTY FOUR AND WEARS HER LONG BROWN HAIR FLAT AGAINST HER HEAD. SHE IS WEARING A TAILORED SUIT. MOST OF HER FACE IS COVERED BY A PAIR OF JACKIE-O SUNGLASSES.
BRIGHTON HAS AGED IN THESE 10 YEARS TO A RON HOWARD ESQUE DIRECTOR. HIS BALDING HEAD IS COVERED BY A BASEBALL CAP AND HE HAS A GARMENT BAG SLUNG OVER HIS SHOULDER
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FRAN B! Gracie! ...um, I mean Grace. |
EVERYONE CLUMSILY EMBRACES. AS THEY ARE HUGGING CC WALKS IN.
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C.C. God I hate plane food! FRAN Hello C.C. C.C. Hello hello everyone. |
THERE IS AN AWKWARD PAUSE BETWEEN EVERYONE.
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MAXWELL Grace, I’m sorry we didn’t get out to California for Christmas. We were going to, but then the twins got the flu and the lead for A Christmas Carol broke his leg... GRACE (UNIMPRESSED) It’s okay, I didn’t even have a tree. I would have come out here sometime in the last few months, but it’s so hard to get off from the theatre. You know how it is dad. BRIGHTON Me too, I’ve been swamped. Which of course is a good thing. Like they say in Hollywood, if you’re not busy... GRACE ...You’re unemployed. |
SFX: CELL PHONE RINGING
C.C., BRIGHTON AND GRACE ALL REACH FOR THEIR CELL PHONES.
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BRIGHTON It’s me (RE: PHONE) Bobby, talk to me. |
BRIGHTON WALKS UPSTAIRS WITH HIS BAG. THERE IS ANOTHER AWKWARD PAUSE
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GRACE Uh, well, I’m going to go unpack. |
GRACE FOLLOWS BRIGHTON UPSTAIRS. JUST THEN MAGGIE ENTERS.
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FRAN MAGGIE! |
MAGGIE AND FRAN EMBRACE. MAXWELL GIVES MAGGIE A HUG THEN TURNS TO LOOK OUT THE DOOR.
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MAXWELL Where’s Michael and my beautiful grand child? MAGGIE Oh yeah, I wanted to call. Sarah has an ear infection so Michael stayed home with her. FRAN Oh, that’s too bad. I was hoping we could all get together... MAGGIE I’m still here, where is everyone? MAXWELL Your brothers and sisters are upstairs, everyone's getting unpacked. MAGGIE Well I guess I’ll go join them. NILES We should go get unpacked too, we’ll see you at dinner. |
NILES AND CC GO UPSTAIRS
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MAXWELL I should probably check on the twins and Emily....why don’t you call ahead and make dinner reservations. FRAN Sure. MAXWELL It’s great to have the whole family under one roof again isn’t it... FRAN Yeah (SIGH) I guess. |
MAXWELL HEADS UPSTAIRS
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If I knew any of these people anymore... |
END FLASH-FORWARD.....
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MAXWELL Fran? Fran? (WAVES HANDS IN FRONT OF FRAN’S FACE) It’s time to cut the cake. |
FRAN HEADS OVER TO THE MAIN TABLE WHERE A GIANT CAKE IS WAITING WITH THE WORDS “CONGRATULATIONS SHEFFIELDS & BABCOCKS!”
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NILES What should we wish for? C.C. Not money, we already have that .(LAUGHS) NILES (SMILES) We’ve got love. (KISSES CC) MAXWELL Any ideas Fran? |
FRAN PAUSED FOR A LONG TIME BEFORE BLURTING OUT...
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FRAN Grace, come back with us to New York and your father and I will let you visit your friends here during the summer. Brighton, please remember to visit us whenever you can and I’ll buy you some Rogaine with Menoxidal. C.C. don’t take the job at the network, you’ve been working with Maxwell long enough that he’ll give a full partnership. |
C.C. GASPS
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MAXWELL I didn’t know you got offered a job. Fran’s right, your official partnership is long overdue, don’t look so surprised. C.C. No, that’s the first time Nanny Fine has called me C.C. to my face. FRAN That’s my wish. I just want us to all stay together so Grace doesn’t start dressing like C.C., Brighton doesn’t go bald and the twins grow up with their brothers and sisters. MAXWELL, CC, BRIGHTON, MAGGIE, GRACE, NILES What? BRIGHTON I am not going bald, I just got a bad haircut. |
JUST THEN THE TWINS, WHO HAVE BEEN TODDLING AROUND THE WHOLE TIME, PULL THE TABLE CLOTH DOWN AND DIVE THEIR HANDS INTO THE STRAWBERRY CAKE.
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FRAN OY! MAXWELL Guys, put that cake down. |
THE TWINS, IN TRUE ONE YEAR OLD FASHION, THROW THE CAKE IN THEIR FISTS. IT LANDS STRAIGHT IN THE FACES OF THE TWO CELEBRATING COUPLES. EVERYONE CRACKS UP.
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MAXWELL Happy Anniversary Everyone! |
FADE OUT
EXT: SHEFFIELD FRONT YARD. A GIANT MOVING VAN IS PARKED OUTSIDE WHILE TWO LARGE MEN LOAD BOXES INTO THE BACK. FRAN AND GRACE STAND NEARBY WITH THE DOUBLE STROLLER SUPERVISING
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GRACE It feels like we’re bouncing around. FRAN Well no one can ever say you’ve had a dull home life. GRACE (SMILING) Nope, not since you’ve entered our lives. |
JUST THEN MOVING MAN #2 COMES OUT FROM THE BACK CARRYING A CHAIR, CC IN TOW. NILES IS BEHIND HER CARRYING BABY EMILY.
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C.C. Be careful with that, it’s worth more than you make in a year. NILES Way to play friendly. MOVING MAN #1 That’s the last of it Mrs. Sheffield. If you’ll just sign this we’ll be on our way. Everything should be in New York by the day after tomorrow. FRAN Great, thanks guys C.C. And don’t forget... MOVING MAN #1 & MOVING MAN #2 Be careful! C.C. I only said it a few... NILES ...thousand times. |
MAXWELL PULLS UP IN A RENTED MINI-VAN WITH BRIGHTON
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MAXWELL Come on everyone, time to go to the airport. |
BRIGHTON GETS OUT OF THE CAR
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BRIGHTON Goodbye guys. FRAN Take care you, and don’t forget to call. |
FRAN AND BRIGHTON HUG
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BRIGHTON OK, no mushy good-byes. I’ll see you guys soon. |
FADE TO....
INT: SHEFFIELD NEW YORK TOWN HOUSE- EVENING. THE BOXES HAVE YET TO ARRIVE FROM CALIFORNIA SO THE WHOLE SHEFFIELD/ BABCOCK CLAN IS SITTING ON THE BARE LIVING ROOM. BOXES OF CHINESE FOOD LITTER THE FLOOR.
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MAXWELL You know, this reminds me of the time we got picked clean by Fran’s mugger. FRAN God, that’s the only time in my life I’ve been thankful you’re anal enough to write down everything we own down to the toothbrushes. FRAN Never a dull moment with the Fine/Sheffield Clan MAXWELL Yes. We were rather lucky getting everything back. I've heard something like that is highly unlikely. NILES (snorts in disbelief) Unlikely? If this wasn't real life I would think we were in some CBS sitcom. MAGGIE We didn't get everything back. I can't believe that goon stole my diary. GRACE Oh that reminds me... (PULLS OUT A WRAPPED GIFT FROM BACKPACK) ...Brighton asked me to give this to you when we arrived. MAGGIE (READING THE CARD) Maggie, congratulations to the future mom-to-be. Here's hoping a little brother will be on the way soon after. (TEARING THE PAPER AND BOW OFF) That stain!! He had my diary the whole time! FRAN Come on everyone, lets open up our fortune cookies. |
EVERYONE DIVES INTO THE PAPER BAG AND PULLS OUT A COOKIE.
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NILES A lifetime of multiple moments come to those who can lie still to wait for them. C.C. A workman who wants to do his work well must first prepare his tools. NILES & CC Switch! |
NILES AND CC SHARE A PRIVATE LAUGH AS THEY TRADE FORTUNES
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MAGGIE We are exactly where we have chosen to be. (SMILES) MAXWELL If you love what you do you will never work a day in your life. FRAN Be here now. This moment is all there is, was or ever will be. GRACE The Universe works in unexpected places, through unexpected people, at unexpected times, its wonders to perform. C.C. (UNDER HER BREATH TO NILES) ...in bed FRAN We all sound so intelligent. If only I had something to read off of all the time. NILES I know a few cue cards I would love to put on the headboard. CC (ELBOWS HIM. PULLS EMILY CLOSER ON HER LAP) Emily, hand mommy those chop sticks you're gumming on. Daddy needs his gingered snow peas squashed. |
SFX :Door bell rings
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GRACE I'll get it. (SCOOPS UP JONAH AND OPENS DOOR)
Melanie! Hi! MELANIE (TEENAGER WITH SHORT BROWN HAIR HUGS GRACE) Gracie, I'm sorry I couldn't wait, I had to see you. Welcome back to New York! GRACE Thanks! (NOTICES A VERY CUTE BOY STANDING BEHIND MELANIE) MELANIE Oh, I'm sorry. This is my cousin Dean. Dean this is Gracie. GRACE (GETS SHY) Hi Dean. DEAN (DAZZLING SMILE) Hi. MAXWELL |
(PEERS AROUND LOOKING IN CONCERN TOWARDS THE PORCH. EVE TODDLES OVER AND SITS ON HIS LAP. HE SMILES AT HIS BABY GIRL AND WHISPERS)
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Promise me you won't get married until you're 30 and Daddy will buy Evie anything she wants. FRAN Max! EVE Loeh - mann's! |
FRAN AND MAX LAUGH.
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DEAN Gracie, I've got tickets for one of the last remaining performances of CATS, want to go? |
AT THE WORD 'CATS' JONAH GIVES A BIG RASPBERRY. FRAN COMES FROM BEHIND.
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FRAN (GETS JONAH FROM GRACE) Oy, maybe I should have named you Junior. That's the same thing your father does whenever he hears that word. |
(TAKES SOMETHING OUT OF HER PURSE AND PLACES IT
ON THE MANTLE)
CLOSE UP OF GOLD FRAMED PHOTO OF A VERY HAPPY FAMILY. MAXWELL AND
FRAN IN THE MIDDLE HOLDING THE TWINS. TO THE LEFT OF THEM,
BRIGHTON WITH HIS ARM AROUND GRACE'S SHOULDER, HOLDING BUNNY EARS
UP TO THE SIDE OF MAGGIE'S HEAD. MAGGIE STANDING NEXT TO GRACE
HOLDING HANDS WITH MICHAEL. TO THE RIGHT OF MAX AND FRAN, NILES
WITH HIS ARM AROUND CC'S WAIST, EMILY IN HER MOTHER'S ARMS. AND
IN FRONT, MORTY, SYLVIA, SAMMY & YETTA IN LOUD CLOTHES
SMILING AT THE CAMERA.
The End
for now.....
I'd like to extend a special thank you to my muse in this project Nelda, who supported me as my one woman cheering squad. And thank you to Barb for believing in me, even if it took some time to get this baby completed.
To all the fans of The Nanny, it's cast and crew, I love you more.
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